‘Fools Rush In’ To Theater To See This

At the movies, there is nothing more pathetic than a romantic comedy about two people who obviously don’t mesh.

The more the movie strains to convince us that the unlikely pair belongs together, the more we root for them to split. In “Fools Rush In,” the mismatched socks are played by Matthew Perry (“Friends”) and Salma Hayek (“Desperado”) - they’re both attractive, they’re both likable, and they couldn’t have worse romantic chemistry if he was a ravenous lion and she was a meaty gazelle with a limp.

But “Fools Rush In“‘s problems go way beyond its miscast leads. A gross premise, for instance: A couple has a one-night stand, parts, meets three months later when the woman is pregnant and decides to marry, without even considering what that means for them or the child.

It’s a bizarrely drab premise for a comedy, and setting it up makes the first 30 minutes of “Fools Rush In” a big, fat drag. Things pick up for a while, until the movie decides to try to make us care about this sham marriage, cooking up dull, cliched problems such as the couple’s conflicting taste in home decor. Then, the movie plays a particularly hateful trick on us with a dramatic plot twist that no one who was lured into “Fools Rush In” by the zany ads will want or expect.

I could go on, but at this point, the only use I can see for “Fools Rush In” is at some perverse movie-revival house, on the top half of a double bill with “Where Angels Fear to Tread.”

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“Fools Rush In” Locations: East Sprague, North Division, Coeur d’Alene and Post Falls Cinema 6 Credits: Directed by Andy Tennant, starring Matthew Perry, Salma Hayek Running time: 1:49 Rating: PG-13