Tips For Job Seekers Who Find Themselves In Out-Of-Work Limbo

Despite all kinds of talk about spending less time at work and more quality time with our families, we still pretty much define ourselves by our jobs. The kind of work we do, who we do it for and how far along we get in our careers affect the way we feel about ourselves.

But when you’re out of work, you’re in limbo.

Sure, you may be a parent or a great gardener, but it’s the job - not the family or the hobbies - that says so much.

When you lose your job, the self-confidence that comes with knowing you’re a professional success evaporates overnight. And it never really gets comfortable to say to someone that you’re … ummm … looking for a job.

Lots of people feel they have no identity if they have no job, said Beth West, who lost her public relations job in 1993 when the pipeline company for which she worked was sold.

Focusing on her identity apart from her professional life made it easier for West to keep up her self-esteem during her job hunt. And it’s critical to feel good about yourself, so you can land another job.

But that’s hard to do, because job seekers face a lot of rejection, said David Small, who runs the University of Houston’s career services. He tries to remind his students if they don’t land the jobs they want, they may lack the skills the boss is looking for.

Many job seekers, especially inexperienced ones, wonder what’s wrong with them, however. Small recalled one student who thought he wasn’t getting a job because of his ethnic surname, so he changed it. That didn’t work.

So forget about changing your identity and concentrate on some confidence boosters that will make job hunting a little easier and a lot more pleasant.

Maintain your routine as much as possible. Some people stop their lives when they lose their jobs, but that’s not good, said Bill Sala, director of Texas, Louisiana and Oklahoma operations for Drake Beam Morin, an outplacement firm in Houston. It’s necessary, of course, to keep a close watch on your finances.

Take care of yourself. Exercise is a great stress reliever, Sala said.

Work out your frustrations at the gym or in the pool. A well-balanced diet will help ward off illnesses.

Do something that spells success. Sala went back to school and took graduate courses after he lost his management position in 1991, when his employer filed for bankruptcy. That gave him a feeling of accomplishment.

Keep a journal to track accomplishments on the job hunt. Tom Morton kept a daily record of resumes he sent and networking calls he made. He paged through it periodically to remind himself he was working hard to find a new job. Morton, who wrote “Survivor’s Guide to Unemployment” after spending 17 frustrating months looking for another newspaper job, is now a reporter at the Star-Tribune in Casper, Wyo.

Don’t sit around in your bed clothes all day. Morton said it helped to get up every morning as if he were heading to work. He dressed immediately after breakfast and was at his desk or in the library bright and early.

Act like a professional. Get business cards printed with your name, address and phone number and hand them to people you meet in your job search. Morton said it cost only a few dollars to print his cards, and they made him feel more professional.

Helping others may make you feel better about your own plight. West volunteered a few hours each week at a hospital, where she filled water pitchers and asked patients to make menu selections. “I got out (of the house), contributed something to society and networked,” she said.

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