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The Spokesman-Review Newspaper
Spokane, Washington  Est. May 19, 1883

One Out Of Two Marriages Thrives

Cheryl Lavin Chicago Tribune

We’ve all memorized that nasty little statistic: one out of two marriages ends in divorce. Which, when you think about it, means one out of two marriages stays together. Let us now praise happy couples.

Diana: “We had only been dating three weeks when we received the horrible news that his ex-girlfriend, with whom he had remained close, had been killed. This was an extremely painful time for him and although it was a little strange for me to be in this position, I remained by his side and helped him through his grieving. Four months later, my ex-boyfriend, whom I had remained friends with, committed suicide. Now the shoe was on the other foot and he helped me. We stayed together for two years, then split up.

“I loved him, but I felt our relationship had never had the chance to develop slowly, in a light-hearted, playful way. I thought we were comfortable only because we could relate to each other’s pain. We both became involved with other people, although we always remained close. I always knew if I needed him, he would be there.

After five years, we began dating again. He wanted to get married, but I still wasn’t ready. So again, we split. After a year, we were back together. This time, after a total of nine years, I had no doubts. Last June we celebrated our love and commitment with a huge blowout wedding of the century. Tragedy triggered our bond, but love and friendship cements it.”

Mark: “Lisa and I have been married 16 years. The major event of that time was in June 1993, when I was diagnosed with cancer. Within 24 hours, I went from breadwinner/husband/father to patient. Lisa went from mother/wife to caregiver. She had to assist me with everything I did, from eating to bathing to going to the bathroom. I was off work for a year. Through God’s grace, I made it through four rounds of chemotherapy and had the tumor removed in 1995. I have been clean ever since.

Recently, Lisa had her first mammogram. They did a more detailed series than usual. For a few days we wondered about the future. My concern was whether I could be as good a caregiver as she had been. Her concern was whether she could be as good a patient as me. We had beaten cancer before, that wasn’t our concern. We were more worried about each other.”

Sandi: “My husband and I just celebrated our 10th wedding anniversary. He had a full day of surprises set up for me. First he took our two kids to Adventure Club for the day and told me to be ready to go to lunch at 11:30. He had a limo pick me up. We drove from home to a restaurant and he was nowhere in sight. The driver walked me in and there he was sitting at a table. The waiter brought over 10 long stem red roses with a card that said, ‘Don’t be late.’ He had made an appointment for a manicure for me. He gave me another card with $300 in it and said, ‘Do not bring home any change.’ After lunch, I shopped until five, then the limo picked me up and brought me home. Mick was there with music and candles. The limo driver took us to a wonderful dinner and then brought us home.

When we pulled up to our house, Mick called to the driver and told him to drive around a little longer. Little did I know this was the driver’s clue to call our next door neighbor. She came over and put candles and roses all over the house. When I walked into the bedroom, there were candles all over, two roses on my pillow and a plaque which said, ‘For the last 10 years, you have made my dreams a reality.’ I felt like a princess.”

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