Dear Ann Landers: Please print this letter for “His Wife in Maryland.” She’s the wife who complained that her husband had turned into a lousy father because of the time he spent with the Other Woman. She wrote, “He works a lot of evenings and weekends and is never home for his kids.” There must be a few thousand women like her out there who might learn something from what I have to say.
Dear Maryland: The night your husband picked me up in that restaurant, I told him he should go home where he belongs. Then, he gave me a little history. He told me how your birth control “failed” and you became pregnant even though you knew he wasn’t ready for children. And talk about bad luck: It happened again with the second child.
You may have him in your life forever, but you will not make him happy. I don’t get him full time, but believe me, I would treat him like a king if I had the chance. Being a realist, I know I have to settle for whatever time I can get because you come first, which is as it should be. By the way, I pay for a lot of those dinners “in good restaurants” because he’s concerned about money for the kids’ shoes and braces. I am in much better shape financially than he is.
Why am I in this relationship? Because, unfortunately, all the attractive, wonderful men out there are married, and I happen to love this one. Just call me - The Other Woman and Not Ashamed
Dear Woman: You didn’t ask for my opinion, but I would be failing in my role if I didn’t offer it.
The time and energy you are investing in this relationship with this married man represents time and energy that could be better spent with someone with whom you might have a future. Give this two-timing Romeo back to his wife full time and go in another direction. You deserve better.
Dear Ann Landers: I am a 17-year-old girl who has been suffering from depression for the past several months. I noticed a few subtle changes in myself but was unaware of the cause. I was sleeping 12 hours a day, yet I never felt rested. I went to see my doctor about these changes, but her conclusion was that I was not consuming enough iron, and the deficiency in my diet was the reason I was always tired.
Over the next few months, I noticed a prolonged sadness and lack of interest in former hobbies I used to enjoy. I was irritable, had difficulty concentrating, cried a lot for no particular reason and felt worthless. When I decided to do a paper on depression for an English assignment, it became clear to me that I had all the symptoms.
I feel that if my physician had been paying more attention, she could have saved me from a lot of needless suffering by diagnosing my condition earlier. I am attempting to fight this battle on my own. If you print this letter, Ann, I believe it will bring me one step closer to defeating this illness. - Still Depressed in Oregon
Dear Oregon: Please ask your doctor to refer you to a psychiatrist who will prescribe medication for your depression. People don’t have to suffer with depression the way they did in the old days. We now have anti-depressants that can make a world of difference. Also, I hope you will consider counseling. You can be helped, and life will be a lot better as soon as you get the psychological and medical support you need.
Gem of the Day (Credit Helen Rowland, author of “Reflections of a Bachelor Girl”): Marriage is a lot like twirling a baton, turning a handspring and eating with chopsticks. It looks so easy until you try it.
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