Use Resources To Change Your Life

Dear Ann Landers: Please tell “Average Girl,” who is in an abusive relationship, to get out quick. The longer she stays, the harder it will be to leave.

I never thought I’d let a man hit me, but three years ago, it happened. I met “Mike,” who seemed like a swell guy. I was in total shock when, in the middle of an argument, he punched me in the face. He hit me so hard I thought my jaw was broken. He swore it would never happen again, but it did.

The abuse continued, but I was afraid to leave because Mike threatened to hunt me down and kill me. He said if he couldn’t have me, no one else would. I finally realized I had to get out.

The solution for me was to sneak out of town without telling him. I moved a thousand miles away to live with a relative. My life is 100 percent better now. I have a good job and am self-supporting, but best of all, I have my self-respect. Please print my letter so other women in abusive relationships will know they don’t have to live like that. - The New Me in a New Town

Dear New You: Thanks for a letter that could change lives. Here’s another one from a soul sister:

Dear Ann Landers: I have never felt so compelled to write to you as right now, after reading the letter from “Average Girl in Every City, U.S.A.”

I was a battered wife for three years. I will not give you a blow-by-blow description of what my life was like. Just let me say it was horrible. After numerous black eyes and broken teeth, the final straw was when I lost twin babies in my seventh month of pregnancy because of a beating.

It took me almost a year to save (and hide) enough money to move my two children and myself across the state to be with my family. Two months after I left, he served me with divorce papers. It was the best Christmas present I ever received. I hope every woman who is living with a batterer will realize there is help available. First, she needs to get out. Next, she needs to know there are more sources for help now than ever before. She should check with her local hospital, her doctor, the police and a crisis clinic. There are some wonderful support groups for abused women these days, and she can avail herself of their services.

Dear Ann Landers: My girlfriend and I were driving up the Pacific Coast Highway to San Francisco recently. We stayed overnight in Oakland. In the morning, when we prepared to leave, my friend took out her car keys and placed them on the roof of the car. I’m sure a lot of people do this.

In the process of stowing the bags, we completely forgot that the keys were up there and spent almost 15 minutes searching for them. Fortunately, my friend had given me a spare set of keys “just in case.”

We set off across the Oakland Bay Bridge, drove up a steep hill and came down on Lombard Street - the one that zigzags like crazy all the way down. Then, we drove straight up Nob Hill. When we stopped to take some photographs of the beautiful scenery, another tourist pointed to the roof of our car. To our complete surprise, the keys were still up there.

I simply cannot explain this. The keys had no magnetic key rings or anything else that would make them stick. My friend and I agree it was an act of God, but tell me, Ann, according to the laws of gravity, shouldn’t the keys have fallen off? - Dumbfounded Fans from Arizona and Kentucky

Dear Dumbfounded: I, too, am baffled. Some things defy reason. Your explanation is as good as any.