Holiday Night Won’T Soon Be Forgotten

Reflecting on the holidays is always a favorite pastime. Realizing how close you came to not getting that special someone a present because you waited until the very last possible second, or how well the dinner went even though you spent 10 minutes putting out an oven fire make great stories.

Sitting back in my cozy chair, I recall this just-past holiday season.

Two relatives visit for a while and decide to bunk up in my room. They are given an inflatable mattress, two blankets and a pillow to sleep on. The night is very cold so the dogs from outside are allowed in, and as luck would have it, they end up in my room. As do the two hamsters, who decide to take up their nocturnal instincts and scamper all around their cage.

It’s a little after midnight and so far things have been quiet — too quiet. Then, all of a sudden, a thunderous ripping noise fills the room. My aunt and uncle and I jerk awake and sit up. A light is turned on. My aunt looks at my uncle, my uncle looks at me and I stare at the dogs. All four of the dogs are sleeping happily, seemingly unaffected by the mysterious wind breaker. Just before accusation are called out, the Dalmation next to my bed rips another one.

He’s promptly removed and put in with my grandparents.

“They won’t notice,” my uncle says.

Sleep eventually falls over the three of us as sugar plum fairies trample on our heads.

I’m awakened around 1:30 by whispers coming from the relatives. I turn on a light and ask what’s wrong. It seems the inflatable mattress they are sleeping on is self-deflatable as well. So the electronic pump is retrieved and started. The dogs, however, don’t like the pump, in fact they think that the pump is some evil entity that must be destroyed if peace is ever to return. As the barking escalates, my aunt promptly removes two more of the dogs. I’m not quite sure where she puts them, but they quickly stop barking.

Once again the house goes quiet, the light goes off and sleep prevails.

Twenty minutes later, my uncle, after losing his mind from the hamsters’ constant scampering, removes the rodents.

It’s 2:07 a.m. and I’m still awake. My aunt, uncle and Archie (the last remaining dog) all are snoring. I decide if I am ever to get any sleep tonight, it will have to be elsewhere.

I step outside my room into the hallway. As I begin my journey to the living room couch, I stub my toe on a cabinet and then trip over the hamster cage that my uncle conveniently placed in the middle of the hallway.

The cage tipped over, the little rodents run like my aunt might after eating some spicy chili. I spend the next half an hour finding the little buggers.

I finally get things squared away. I sleepily flop myself onto the couch. Before I doze off, I hear a door squeak open and something moving about. I pay it little attention and let my mind drift.

I’m awakened some time later by a dog with bad indigestion.