Reservist couple get Christmas together
SALEM, Ore. – Larry and Cathie Raaf are soul mates, parents and soldiers.
In years of marriage, they have spent only two wedding anniversaries together, but by luck or chance, this Christmas will be spent at home.
For these members of the U.S. Army Reserves, the notion of “don’t take each other for granted” has meaning.
“Whenever he makes a pot of coffee, he always pours me a cup,” said Cathie, 45, a major. “And he always touches me. That’s important because he’s not always there to touch me.”
Larry, 49, a colonel, returned from 11 months in Afghanistan in October. Cathie will be deployed overseas early next year.
“It’s a balancing act, no doubt,” said Larry, an emergency planner for Bonneville Power Administration. “Luckily, we haven’t both been deployed at the same time.”
Their son, Peter, 21, a specialist with the 160th Special Operations Aviation Regiment, is stationed in Kentucky.
Their daughter, Karen, 13, enjoys the time she has with her parents.
“I hear my friends complain that they wish they could get away from their parents,” she said. “Mine go away on their own.”
The reunions are happy, but require adjustments, the couple said.
“You get set into a routine and then someone re-enters,” said Cathie, a nurse at Salem Clinic.
In 1997, when Larry returned from Bosnia, it was their son, Peter, who struggled.
“He had been the man of the house,” Cathie said. “The line was graying.”
It was clear early on that Peter would follow his parents into the military.
When duty kept the Raafs from Peter’s wedding, he understood, and they understand his holiday absence this year.
Cathie, in uniform for 19 years, says there is no immunity from the fears and worries that relatives of soldiers endure.
“Not only do I wear the green suit, but I’m the wife and the mother,” Cathie said. “I can understand the military mission, but it doesn’t make it easier. And sometimes, it’s harder because I know more than some of them know.”
It’s tough being apart four to five times per year.
“Our interest in public service is what makes us want to do this,” said Larry, who joined the reserves 27 years ago.
In Afghanistan, he witnessed American troops help in that country’s first election.
“The point of the military operation is to go in and destroy the enemy,” Larry said. “But we also get a chance to go in and do something positive.”
Reconstructing destroyed clinics, vaccinating children and tending to sick or diseased animals is all part of the focus, Larry said.
This Christmas, the Raafs are looking forward to quiet family time with Karen and their niece, Amber Welch, a student at West Point.
As always, Cathie’s pending departure will be difficult, but Larry understands.
“I’ll keep the lights on,” he said.