‘I pray for you’ should be more than just words
“I pray for you.”
The words just kind of hung there for a few seconds. My friend looked into my eyes, searching for deeper meaning in those four words.
I looked away, embarrassed by the elephant I had ridden into the room. Until that day, my friend and I hadn’t seen each other in months.
So when our paths crossed at the grocery store, we did our best to get caught up with each other’s lives.
Then, as we pushed our grocery carts their separate ways, I said it.
“I pray for you.”
Christians sometimes use those words a little too casually. For many it has become a form of greeting, or a phrase uttered with little thought when we say goodbye.
As he looked into my eyes that afternoon several years ago, my friend seemed to be calling me on it. Did I really pray for him?
Since I hadn’t seen him or his family in months, what did I pray about? His eyes asked the question: Why say it if you don’t mean it?
I’m sure I would not have wanted to answer the question back then. But the incident lingers in my mind as a reminder that I enjoy the privilege, and the duty, of praying sincerely for fellow believers.
But how do I pray for them, specifically? What if I don’t even know what’s going on in their lives?
It’s interesting that the apostles’ powerful prayers in the New Testament often were voiced from a distance.
For example, Paul’s prayers for the church at Ephesus were inspired by the Holy Spirit while the apostle was in prison in Rome. And it’s instructive that Paul’s prayers for his fellow Christians had little to do with their external circumstances. He prayed for their hearts.
Paul never prayed, “God, be with the missionaries.” Listen to the apostle’s heart as he prays for the Ephesians:
“Therefore, I also … do not cease to give thanks for you, making mention of you in my prayers: that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of glory, may give you the spirit of wisdom and revelation in the knowledge of Him, the eyes of your understanding being enlightened… .” (Ephesians 1:15-18).
That’s quite a mouthful. For me, smaller bites are in order. First, Paul humbly thanked the Lord for his Christian brothers and sisters in Ephesus. He desired that God grant them spiritual wisdom.
He prayed they would have a deeper knowledge of Christ. What a powerful prayer!
How might God’s people be energized, spiritually, if our heartfelt prayers for them focused on their inner person — their relationship with our Savior?
Sure, we can pray that others be healthy, or that their employment circumstances improve, or that they get an A on their next exam. In fact, we should pray those things.
The Bible tells Christians that we ought to be people who are “casting all of care upon Him, for He cares for you” (1 Peter 5:7).
But let’s not stop there.
Let’s pray that God empowers other believers where they need it most – in their inner person. An “inner man” that is in disarray cannot possibly cope with difficult circumstances, or steer clear of sin, or effectively shine the light of the gospel in the world.
We need to look no farther than our own lives to test that truth. We flail about most when we’re spiritually starved, when we’ve neglected prayer and Bible study and fellowship with other believers.
That “walk with God” is the air we breathe, and we cannot live, spiritually, without that air. Without that air, we can be neutralized by the world, thrown into mere “survival mode.”
Paul prayed that the Ephesians acknowledge Christ in more and more of their lives and that spiritual wisdom would guide their conduct.
Yet there is more. For his Ephesian friends, Paul also prayed “that you will know what is the hope to which he has called you, how rich are the wonderful blessings he promises his people, and how very great is his power at work in us who believe.” (Ephesians 1:18-19, Good News Bible).
The very power that raised Jesus from the dead and placed him at the right hand of God in heaven is ever-present in believers. It gives us an ability to live victoriously as a people with the hope of eternal life in heaven!
But often that power is ignored or forgotten in the shadows of busyness, complacency, strife, or more overt sin.
Paul’s prayer inspires us. It inspires us to pray that other Christians be strengthened in the inner man, that they be blessed with an understanding of the hope and power that is within them, and use it to God’s glory.
How they’ll long to hear our familiar words:
“I pray for you.”