Simple Life 2’ heads on road trip
Call it “Night of the Living Bimbos.”
Young women who don’t mind showing a lot of skin are very in this year, and they’ve got new shows all over TV tonight.
On Fox at 8 and 9, you can tune in to the premiere episodes of “The Simple Life 2.”
This time, instead of moving into one small town, Hollywood bimbettes Paris Hilton and Nicole Richie are taking a monthlong road trip through the heartland, giggling and gawking at the little people. So nice of them.
You must have seen the ads — it’d be a lot more fun if they let the fat guy give them a bikini wax, don’t you think? Unfortunately the dramatic highlight comes in the first episode tonight, when Paris takes a spill from a horse.
Then on MTV at 10, it’s the third-season premiere of “Newlyweds: Nick and Jessica.”
Yes, the oddsmakers were wrong: Jessica Simpson and hubby Nick Lachey are still together, and MTV’s cameras are still following them around. She’s wide-eyed and clueless, and he’s grumpy and ho-hum. Aside from her famous moron moment when she was comically confused by Chicken of the Sea brand tuna, it’s hard to understand how this show got so popular.
A cynic might suggest that there are two reasons, right in front of Jessica.
Somewhat predictably, Jessica’s younger sister, Ashlee, also has a record deal, and now she’s getting her own show, debuting at 10:30 on MTV.
“The Ashlee Simpson Show” will trail her through the making of her CD. If you don’t have anything nice to say about that, come and sit by me.
Highlights
TV hell, ABC at 8: An hour of “My Wife and Kids” repeats, followed by an hour of new “Drew Carey” episodes, followed by an hour of “The Ultimate Love Test.”
“60 Minutes,” CBS at 8: Hey, they’ve dropped the “II!” Such excitement.
Tonight’s stories include one about a young woman who travels to Vietnam to find the truth about the father she never knew.
“Fear Factor,” NBC at 8: Repeat. Contestants are handcuffed and tossed into a tank of water.
“Soul Survivors” (2001), WB at 8: Casey Affleck and Eliza Dushku star in this supernatural thriller.
“Quintuplets,” Fox at 8:30: Premiere. Andy Richter’s imaginative, funny, self-titled sitcom lasted only a season.
Now he’s been cast as the hapless father of five 15-year-olds in this predictable-looking sitcom. But Richter has a way of making everything around him better, so it’s worth giving this one a chance. And besides, it’s not a repeat.
“King of Queens,” CBS at 9: Hourlong repeat finds the newly slim Doug taking Carrie for a romantic getaway.
“Law & Order,” NBC at 9: Back-to-back repeats. In the first a carjacking involves a vial of the highly contagious SARS virus. Then pieces of a body are discovered in several different trash piles.
“Method and Red,” Fox at 9:30: Premiere. There’s promise in this fish-out-of-water sitcom, in which the two rappers move into snooty Nottingshire Estates to provide a nice life for Method’s hardworking, no-nonsense mother (Anna Maria Horsford).
Watching them bring the bling to their suburban neighbors should be good for laughs at least once. Besides, it’s not a repeat.
“48 Hours Investigates,” CBS at 10: Three generations of women from one family work in a New Orleans brothel.