Gear up for Camp
The best, most exciting things about summer camp, and especially sleep-away camp, are also the same things that present challenges for many children: separation from their parents, meeting new people and being asked to do new skills, sports or crafts.
Kids’ mixed feelings about going off to camp — whether it’s for a few days or the bulk of the summer — can manifest themselves in dreams, nightmares or general irritability, says Catherine Hutter, a psychologist at St. Louis Children’s Hospital.
There are many things parents can do, though, to help set their children’s minds at ease as they prepare to pack up, according to Hutter.
Some suggestions:
“ Include kids in the camp selection process. Take virtual tours on camp Web sites or visit open houses together.
“ Have your child go to the same camp as a friend. Two buddies might warm up to camp sooner than a singleton.
“ Encourage a weekend sleepover at a relative’s house. “If they cope well for a weekend away, they’ll likely do well at camp,” Hutter says.
“ Prepare kids for possible feelings of anxiety. Tell them it’s normal to sometimes feel homesick.
“ Tell stories of your own positive camp experiences.
“ Go shopping for new camp clothes and toiletries, but also allow children to pick some of their comfort items from home, such as a stuffed animal or favorite pillow.
All of the above steps give children some sense of control of the process instead of feeling like they’re being shipped off, explains Hutter, a faculty member at Washington University School of Medicine.
Generally, most 10- to 12-year-olds are ready for a sleep-away camp, but Hutter says she knows some younger campers who’ve had a great time, and older ones who haven’t.
Factors to consider are a child’s age, experience and temperament, she says.
Parents also have to be aware how they present the concept of camp. While they don’t want to build up a false image of an absolutely perfect experience, they don’t want to create problems that might not exist by overpreparing children about anxieties, Hutter says.
“Kids take their cues from parents. If mom says she’s going to miss the kids while they’re away a thousand times, the kids don’t have a chance,” she adds. “There’s a delicate balance between excitement and anxiety.”
Often children aren’t concerned about big-picture things — “What happens if I get hurt? Who could sign off on medical care?” — instead, they worry about where the bathroom is and how to roll a sleeping bag, Hutter says.
Once the big drop-off day comes, Hutter urges parents to keep their goodbyes short.
“Difficult as it may be to peel a crying, clinging child off your leg and walk out the door quickly, it’s the best strategy,” according to Hutter. “Lingering just delays the agony and confuses the child.”
(Most camp counselors will tell you that most crying children will start playing with other campers as soon as their parents are out of sight.)
Once the children are at camp, a few more tears or letters with a laundry list of complaints aren’t uncommon — and probably aren’t anything for parents to worry about. However, Hutter says, camp isn’t for everyone and some children might be better off spending their summer doing something else.