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The Spokesman-Review Newspaper
Spokane, Washington  Est. May 19, 1883

Mom’s history with CPS is cause for worry

Kathy Mitchell Marcy Sugar Creators Syndicate

Dear Annie: When my older sister died a few years ago, she left her 8-month-old son, “Timmy,” in the care of my mother and stepfather. Within three months, they were spanking him for everything, and as he grew more mobile, Mom was not able to care for him properly. After calling the police four times to catch him after he ran out of the house, Children’s Protective Services took Timmy away. He was finally placed with his biological father.

Here is my problem: My wife just gave birth to our first child, a girl. My mother has been over to see her a few times and often says she would be more than happy to baby-sit. Actually, her offers border on insistent.

I love my mother, but I don’t want my child left alone with her. I worry Mom will be irresponsible or abusive, and I can’t take that chance. How am I supposed to keep my daughter safe without offending my mother? — Concerned in California

Dear Concerned: Worry less about offending your mother and more about protecting your daughter. Tell Mom, “It’s much too soon for us to be thinking about baby sitters. We’ll let you know.” As far as we’re concerned, you can repeat that until your daughter is 16.

Dear Annie: I read the letter about the couple who upgraded the cruise gift the in-laws gave them. I was outraged anyone would do this. It’s not as if the parents won’t notice. How insulting.

When you are given a gift, you should accept it graciously. The parents certainly could have afforded a better cabin for themselves if they hadn’t invited along their son and daughter-in-law. For the children to upgrade their cabin is rude and ungracious. If this were my son, I’d cancel the trip. — Poor Etiquette in Wisconsin

Dear Wisconsin: Ungracious is a good word, but we’d rather believe the couple was simply taking advantage of a wonderful opportunity and meant no disrespect to the parents. Here’s one more:

Dear Annie: You were right on the money when you said this might be a chance of a lifetime for their son and wife to take that kind of trip.

We had a similar situation when my in-laws purchased a two-day vintage train trip for us to the Grand Canyon during a visit to Arizona. While we completely appreciated the wonderful gift, we decided to pay for an upgrade, since we probably would never get the chance to have that “first class” experience again.

If my in-laws were upset, they never let on, bless them. After eight years, that trip is still one of our most cherished memories. In fact, when we talk about it, we never remember that we paid for the upgrade. The whole experience is credited to the wonderful gift his parents gave us. — Omaha, Neb.

Dear Annie: Would you please tell retailers that the elderly and mildly handicapped like to shop, too? We’re more than happy to spend our money, but we are prevented by lack of assistance. We cannot reach items stacked up high. We cannot search all over for the right style or size. We cannot stand in line forever.

Extra cashiers and clerks would help. And chairs scattered around the stores would give us a chance to rest. It might increase business. It certainly would increase positive feelings. Thank you for giving me a chance to vent. — Redding, Calif.

Dear Redding: You’re welcome. We doubt many businesses would be willing to take on extra help, but it would be nice if a few chairs or benches could be added to make the shopping experience more pleasant and less taxing.