Busy family thrilled to welcome another child

His wife’s out all night, while he’s busy with six children. Over the past six years, 14 children have lived in their home. And now, his wife is pregnant.

The Post Falls couple is thrilled.

By night, Gayle Jernstrom is a paramedic for American Medical Response. Her husband, Jim, is a stay-at-home dad with their six foster children, ages 6 to 14. Jim also manages to fit in two shifts a month as a dispatcher for Gayle’s employer.

Together, the Jernstroms make a formidable team.

They married nine years ago. When they met, both worked as volunteers with Post Falls Ambulance. On St. Patrick’s Day, they were “fixed up” by well-meaning friends who thought the two would hit it off.

It worked – the following New Year’s, they married. Both wanted a large family, and from the start, they were raising children, beginning with Gayle’s child from another marriage.

“Jim and I were raising my son, Brad Oliver (now 17), but we were unsuccessful at having our own. We looked into adoption, when a friend recommended foster care, since that can work into adoption. Our first child, Kevin, came to live with us three months later.”

The Jernstroms have been foster parents for six years. Needing more room, they moved into a six-bedroom home. Gayle’s mother moved nearby, to help out.

“During baseball season, Mom takes one kid to a game, and Jim and I each take another. The rest are split up between us. Family support is very important.”

The Jernstroms are enthusiastic about foster parenting.

“It’s fascinating!” Gayle says. “We learn something new all the time from these kids. It can also be very sad when they leave. We try to remind ourselves that everything happens for a reason; we just don’t know what that reason is.”

Like “Super Nanny,” Jim has a set schedule for running their busy home.

“It wouldn’t work, otherwise,” he says. “And the kids have chores: They make their beds, clean their rooms and help with laundry.”

“He even makes to-do lists for me if he’s doing dispatch work,” Gayle adds. “Our refrigerator has a full, two-month calendar on it.”

“We’ve learned that we need a united front, because the kids outnumber us 3-to-1, Jim says. “Hopefully, they’ll never figure this out or we’ll be overthrown.”

Now, they’ll be adding another child to their clan: Gayle is five months’ pregnant; they discovered the happy news on her birthday.

“The kids are almost as excited as we are – lots of volunteers to help. But just wait until that first messy diaper,” Gayle says, smiling.

She reflects on how it was for her son, Brad, growing up with foster brothers and sisters.

“Brad’s a great kid. He calls us ‘The Brady Bunch.’ Having foster children opened his eyes to the world out there, and that not everyone comes from a perfect home. But he understood it was what we wanted to do.”

When asked what qualities are important in foster parenting, desire and patience are two words the Jernstroms emphasize.

“These kids come from all different backgrounds, some too hard to imagine. But they’re just children; they’re the innocents. Being able to adapt and a willingness to learn how to best help each child is important,” Jim says.

Gayle notes other foster parents can be a resource.

“We’ve developed a support system with other foster families. This gives us the opportunity for Family Fun Night for the kids, and the chance for us to visit with the adults.”

Caseworker horror stories didn’t deter the Jernstroms from foster parenting.

“You hear terrible stories about bad foster homes and working with the state. But caseworkers are overwhelmed. It’s a difficult job that people on the outside don’t see. Caseworkers are perceived as the bad guys – go easy on them,” Jim says.

The Jernstroms love emergency medical work, almost as much as they love foster parenting. Gayle recalls receiving unexpected thanks.

“I received a call from the uncle of a child, thanking us for saving his nephew from a near-drowning. Those moments, I know I made a difference in that patient’s life.”

But she notes there are tough times, too.

“The look on a parent’s face when you tell them their child didn’t survive, that’s a feeling that stays with you for awhile.”

Before emergency medical work, Jim was a manager at Krispy Kreme, then Gateway Computers. Gayle was a manager at Sears.

When Gateway transferred Jim to Billings, Gayle took that opportunity to get paramedic training at Montana State University.

Gayle feels there’s no better job out there than being a paramedic.

“So many lives are touched every day, and differences made. There are sad and frustrating moments, but my next call could be the one that reminds me why I chose this career field.”

And the love the Jernstroms have for children is why they chose foster parenting.

“We’ve shed many tears when children leave, but we remember they’re not ours to keep. But we care for them as if they’re our own.”

Their greatest moment?

“The day we found out we could adopt Kevin,” the couple said.

Their advice to others interested in foster parenting, is that it can be very rewarding, and also very heartbreaking.

“Be prepared for both,” Jim says.