Work friendships remain strong, true

Life has sent me a few reminders that I’m not exactly a spring chicken anymore.

One occurred recently when a car passed me while I thought I was rocketing down a two-lane Idaho road. What hurt was that the car was a Honda Element – a sensible vehicle but still a metal box on wheels.

The only remaining driving indignity left is to be passed by a Safeway shopping scooter or a three-wheeled parking-enforcement vehicle.

Another sign of advancing years was the recent gathering of some longtime friends. These friends are former co-workers who did much of the software engineering work in Spokane during the glory days of such notable companies as AS&I, ISC, and a host of other alphabet shops.

The occasion was Dan getting married. Happens every day, right?

Not for Dan – he’s 52, and this is his first trip to the altar.

Dan may or may not be Spokane’s most eligible bachelor, but he’s certainly one of the longest running – “running” being the operative word. Miraculously, without aid of e-dating or his own bachelor TV show, he is on the precipice of the matrimonial threshold with a 28-year-old beauty named Amanda.

Amanda is as kind as she is pretty. Very carefully, she has weaned Dan off his famous hat collection, some 50 strong and always prominently displayed on the walls of his home.

When we heard that, Dan’s overprotective friends canceled the Amanda background checks and conceded this is the woman for him.

It hit me that night that I had been a friend with most of the people in the room for more than 20 years – some more than 30 years.

On the guys, you can see those years – hairlines and waistlines have gone north and east respectively.

The ladies, well, they are prettier than ever, quicker to smile, and more assured of themselves after years of employment in what was once considered a man’s world – engineering. As kids right out of college, or my case the military, we rolled up our sleeves, went into conference rooms with whiteboards and doughnuts and came out with plans that led to signs, banking systems and meter readers.

There’s much truth to the saying we don’t pick our relatives, and unless we’re in management, we don’t pick our co-workers, either. But sometimes you luck into a group of co-workers so good-natured, warm-hearted and intelligent that being around them is an everyday joy.

We didn’t just say “hi” and “bye” on an 8-to-5 schedule. It was more involved than that, in a way that rarely happens anymore in the American work force.

If somebody was moving, we would assemble a fleet of trucks. There were ball games and the beach.

Long lunches involved “three dogs, three beers, three bucks,” which would get you a visit from the legal department today. Some childbirths we celebrated have presented us with grandchildren now.

I thought I would work with these friends forever, that we would get gold watches together. The reality turned out to be that I’ve known only one engineer to retire on his own schedule.

Our “gold watches” often turned out to be walking papers as we became “salary cap casualties,” too expensive in the eyes of bottom-line watchers as sales ebbed and flowed. But this intelligent group turned those walking papers into second careers in worthwhile endeavors, such as Habitat for Humanity or another spin around a start-up company.

We have each other’s friendship and loyalty, which is more valuable than a gold watch, a bulging 401(k) account or a retirement home on the water.

One day too soon, we’ll be meeting again for friends who won’t be attending any more gatherings. But what a ride we’ve had together.