Tough to fix bureaucrats’ flub from Iraq
Didja hear the one about the wife whose National Guard husband was stationed in Kirkuk? Seems the Social Security Administration transposed Sgt. Nicholas Metzger’s birth date and had trouble ID’ing him. Which snagged his tax return. And caused wife Carla to sputter when the gummint (for whom her hubby works) insisted he appear in person to confirm his identity. SSA wouldn’t budge, even when Sgt. Metzger called from Iraq. After U.S. Sen. Larry Craig’s office called, however, the bureaucRATs sent the brave sergeant a form to fill out. Meanwhile, his wife is still waiting for this snafu to untangle. Stay tuned.
Separated at birth?
I published a photo of BNSF spinmeister Gus Melonas online Wednesday and asked commenters to tell me who he resembled. The early responses were predictable: Kermit The Frog, Satan and “My Uncle Eddie – Eddie the Strangler.” Then, the femme commenters checked in. One said Gus was “easy on the eyes (If he’s not married, he can be the next bachelor).” Another: “Oh how I wish I was mayor of the City of Hauser so I could dine with this hunk in the executive car on the train ride to nowhere.” A third complained: “C’mon now, can’t the SR find just one unflattering photo rather than the one released by the BN PR department? (Heck), even I look great with a makeover!!” You can see our unflattering second photo by going to Huckleberries Online.
It happened in CdA
The Little Old Lady from Pasadena has nothing on the 79-year-old ex-salsa/ballroom dancer who climbed aboard a hog in front of the Iron Horse Saturday, April 30. After admiring the chopper and mentioning her daughter owned one, the almost 80-something asked for and got a ride. HBO has a photo to prove it (courtesy of eyewitnesses Bob Salsbury and galpal Kris) … Overheated Coeur d’Alene High boys lined up at the school office, with rose in hand, after a student announcer tongue-twisted while promoting International Baccalaureate, a program for the college bound. What came out was “international bachelorette” … Among her “Top Ten Underestimated Talents of a Teen,” columnist Kimmie Hario lists for the CHS student newspaper: Being able to label someone by something as trivial as how they tie their shoes. Of such trivia was “Seinfeld” made.
Poet’s corner
“One hundred years/but still unlearned:/trust a railroad/and you’ll get burned” – The Bard of Sherman Avenue (“History Lesson”) … “Depression isn’t happiness turned upside down, it’s happiness sucked into a vacuum cleaner and then the bag explodes spraying dirt and lint balls all over your just cleaned carpet and filling the air with dust making you sneeze and go back to bed” – Bob Salsbury/Random Shallow Thoughts.
Huckleberries
And the answer is: “Don’t get caught.” Question? What’s the bottom line of student Natalie Sievert’s editorial about the upcoming Coeur d’Alene High senior kegger. Hmm … Vanity Plate (on a brown Cadillac DeVille): “NOMO925” … In the “Unclear on the Concept” Dept., Huckleberries Online spotted a flier from Burton Academy of Beauty Culture & Hair Design (at Post Falls) for a “back facial” for $25 and up. Isn’t that an oxymoron? … Trivial Question: Which two Repubs, with surnames beginning in W, have combined to hold the Kootenai County coroner’s office since 1946? HBO has the answer.
Parting shot
Junior Miss contestants are the crème de la crème – bright, talented, poised. And do you know how the cream of the crop answered a question posed by mock judges about the biggest problem between parents and children today? Each junior girl practicing for this Thursday-Friday’s Coeur d’Alene Jr. Miss said: Communication. And some complained their parents don’t ask where they’re going or whom they’re with. Read: Your teen daughter has buddies. She needs parents.