The Slice: Gearing up to present a prized pickle

I KEEP RUNNING into people who won ribbons at the fair. A young colleague received one for his homemade beer. A friend’s daughter was similarly honored for a photograph she took in Alaska. And so on. So I’ve decided. Next year, I’m entering something. Now I just need to figure out what that will be. Feel free to suggest something. Right now I’m leaning toward pickles.

•Steadfast on the South Hill: It has been said that change is the one constant in life. So how do you explain the cashiers at the Rosauers on 29th?

There are five or six women who have been at the store since the Truman administration. Or something like that.

And while the rest of us continue to age, those ladies don’t seem to get older. Hmmm.

Anyway, some enterprising student ought to come up with an economic indicators index linking the changing hairstyles of those cashiers and the state of the regional economy.

•It says here: Certain styles of dancing might be vulgar attempts to attract attention or shock adults. But erotic? Sorry. For that, nothing beats old-fashioned tight-clench slow dancing.

Kids, take a tip from your old pal, Uncle Slice. If “hot” is what you’re going for, ridiculous X-rated posing is no match for an actual dance-floor embrace.

No offense, but flailing bump and grind moves are a joke.

On the other hand, swaying gently and breathing in the smell of a girl’s hair, well, that’s something a tad more grown up.

•If you look hard enough, Spokane connections can be found anywhere: A writer who covers the National Hockey League did a story about nicknames for Pittsburgh Penguins phenom Sidney Crosby. Various possibilities were discussed. But the Penguins’ coach said the rookie should be called “Bing.”

•Looking ahead to Columbus Day: It’s not hard to understand why Native Americans everywhere would lack enthusiasm for this holiday. But I’m thinking of something quite local here.

A brief Slice item last week mentioning Chief Qualchan prompted a reader to suggest that Spokane should be ashamed to have any streets or whatever named after Col. George Wright. (Depending on your perspective, Wright was either a zealous Indian-fighter or a soulless murderer.)

So how do you feel about the Wright place names?

•Gender roles/sign of progress: In coed touch-football, the female quarterbacks of today are better passers than in years past.

•Warm-up questions: How many people never look at pornography but do occasionally use the Internet to check out pictures of attractive showbiz personalities, athletes, broadcasters, et cetera? How many people with relatives or friends residing at The Waterford retirement community refer to the place, for no particular reason, as The Watergate?

•Today’s Slice question: Have you ever noticed that you never see Mark Few and The Shermanator from the “American Pie” movies in the same room?