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The Slice: Today’s names make you want to cry like a baby


Stockxpert
 (Stockxpert / The Spokesman-Review)

You might have observed that The Spokesman-Review has been taking note of its upcoming 125th anniversary.

Well, a reader named Pam called and suggested a looking-back-over-the-years theme: Baby names.

She said The Slice ought to print birth announcements from long ago, to note how things have changed.

OK. That sounded good to me. You know how I love the topic of baby names.

Of course, I wasn’t certain that the newspaper listed the arrival of newborns way back when. It turned out, though, we did.

One problem: The S-R did not include the babies’ first names.

Here’s an entry from July 12, 1917: “Bush � To Mr. and Mrs. R. M. Bush, 1213 Fairview Avenue, July 4, a daughter.”

A colleague checked decade by decade and she confirmed that essentially this same format was employed for the next 70 years.

Here’s one from 1987: “Harris � To Gordon and Linda Harris, E11012 Sixth, girl.”

At least, by then, mom got to have her first name included. It must have been not long after that when the babies’ names started appearing.

Before then, readers who did not know the parents had but one option. They had to guess the kid’s name.

But, you know, that could be fun.

Let’s play. I’ll go first.

1917: Wingate � To Mr. and Mrs. L. A. Wingate, E3330 Fourth Avenue, July 2, a daughter � Dakotah.

1927: Cooper � To Mr. and Mrs. Alfred A. Cooper, N1505 Wall Street, June 10, a son � Spartacus.

1937: Black � To Mr. and Mrs. Maurice D. Black, S1221 Division, a son � Xxxxavyur.

1947: Mertens � To Mr. and Mrs. Melvin C. Mertens, W2623 Maxwell, May 30, a daughter � Madasuhn Hehvuhn.

1957: McKinley � To Mr. and Mrs. Robert I. McKinley, E704 Walton, twin girls � Train Wreck and Shakira Louise.

1967: Hartman � To Mr. and Mrs. Paul Hartman, N6201 Stevens, girl � Twiggy.

1977: James � To Mr. and Mrs. William James, W2904 Fairview, girl � Funkina.

1987: Rice � To John and Sherrie Rice, E7120 11th, boy � Ernest T. Bass.

Chances are, those were not the actual names. But if I had been really trying, I might have guessed right.

After all, parents used to select real names.

Those were the days.

�Thanks: To the kids who sent in their completions of the little story I started in the Monday mini-Slice July 16. All were good.

�Warm-up question (for readers who are old enough to have been in the white-collar work force in 1960 and have seen AMC’s new series “Mad Men”): Does the show’s depiction of drinking, smoking and Stone Age gender relations strike you as accurate?

�Today’s Slice question: What’s your all-time personal best for most showers in one day?

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