Gee, these millionaires have it tough

Move over, Latrell Sprewell. At long last, you have competition as poster boy for the “out-of-touch” athletes movement. All it took was the threat of a visit from the taxman.

Before we open the floor to nominations, let’s be clear about this: First, no one likes to pay higher taxes; and second, no one should begrudge ballplayers the money they make.

Despite what some people still think, those are not “kids’ games” they’re playing and they didn’t get to the top of their profession by being “lucky.” If pro sports team owners spectacularly overestimated their value every so often well, good for them. The headlines these days prove the Steinbrenners weren’t the only bosses taking big risks.

So, while being rich is not the same thing as being out of touch, talking about how rich you are is just that.

Sprewell was taking home $14.6 million in the final year of a contract with the Minnesota Timberwolves in 2004 when the club, recognizing his advancing age and declining skills, offered him a three-year, $30-million extension. Insulted, Sprewell turned it down, saying famously, “I’ve got my family to feed.”

What set off a round of similar grousing in the pro sports world this week was the election of Barack Obama, and with it the likelihood of a hike in both the top tax rate – from 35 percent to 39.6 percent – and Social Security taxes.

“It’s a sad day for me,” said Minnesota defensive lineman Jared Allen, who supported John McCain. “There is nothing I can do about it now.”

Woe is him. Allen joined the Vikings from the Kansas City Chiefs for three draft picks just before the season started, signing a record six-year contract for a defensive player. He got $31 million in guaranteed money and can make as much as $74 million. That’s on top of the extra $69 he insisted on to match his jersey number.

Who else is sweating every nickel and dime? Boo (Hoo) Weekley, for one.

The PGA golfer was preparing for the Children’s Miracle Network Classic at Disney tournament Wednesday when he felt a stabbing pain in his back only to discover it was his wallet. Weekley would rather be hunting and fishing than playing golf, so he’s talked often about retiring. Once he banked $8 million, Weekley vowed, he would call it quits.

“That number went up, as of last night,” he said.

Don’t know if Weekley’s heard this, but retirement just got pushed back for anyone with a 401(k) plan, and the rest of us won’t have courtesy cars, lavish buffets and the easy money of lucrative sponsor outings to soften the blow.

So instead of complaining, we’d advise Weekley to do what most smart athletes are doing. Stop talking to reporters, get your agent and the accounting department on the phone and get what you’re owed before the end of the year. Or maybe just win more.

A professor at Chapman University calculated that Tiger Woods’ take-home pay from the $1.35 million check he earned for winning last year’s U.S. Open was $764,000, a figure that could be cut by almost $200,000 if he wins it again in 2009. But you won’t hear a peep from Woods about that.

If there’s some good news in all of this, it’s that athletes seem to have a better grasp of personal finances than they did only a decade ago.