Despite my best efforts, callers are hooked by ‘cane’
I lost track long ago of the number of times I have corrected long-distance callers on the pronunciation of “Spokane.”
It’s practically one of my hobbies.
The reactions of these survey takers, pollsters, sales reps and customer-service feedback collectors tend to fall into one of five categories.
1. Moment of silence meaning “Who cares?”
2. Fake gratitude for the correction, which means “I hate you and I hate this job!”
3. Moment of silence meaning that the caller doubts my word on this.
4. Caller continues reading from script and pays no attention to what I said because he isn’t listening and is, in actuality, thinking about how the woman in the next cubicle looks in her new blouse.
5. Caller quickly goes on to say “Spo-cane” again, followed by him or her hearing a dial tone and presumably sputtering “Hello? Hello? Mr. Tanner? Are you there?”
What has been your experience?
In a comic book universe, continued: “I can’t believe your list overlooked the infamous Mighty Marmot, the archetypal Spokane superhero,” wrote George Suttle.
“Unlike his cousin Wolverine, Mighty Marmot spends nine months of the year sleeping and the other three mostly hiding in his Drainage Pipe of Solitude.”
Slice answers: According to Bill Shugg, the biggest difference between Spokane-area kids’ soccer and World Cup soccer is the fact that, in the case of the former, parents care more about the outcomes than do the players.
Others mentioned the presence of drunken hooligans among the spectators. I’m guessing that’s a reference to the international competition.
A recent headline that reminded me of a copy desk scene in the final season of “The Wire”: “Bad smell prompts evacuation in Spokane.” – The Seattle Times
Two-fer: 1. For some couples, height difference complicates hand-holding. 2. Not everyone is good at winking.
Today’s Slice question: If some honcho at a Spokane TV station asked you to come up with a new slogan for its local news coverage – something more modest than the usual ridiculous lies and boasts – what would you suggest?