Annie’s Mailbox: Change could start with blood sugar

Dear Annie: I’ve been married to “Mitch” for seven years, and we have a 4-year-old son. Mitch provides well for us, and everyone at his job thinks he’s the best. Unfortunately, we see a different side of him at home.

Mitch is diabetic. Sometimes he doesn’t take care of himself. When he hasn’t slept enough or eaten enough, he behaves like a mean, bratty child. We were recently invited to his parents’ home for dinner, and he announced that he wasn’t going to eat anything. On the drive home, he took a nap, and when he woke up, he had no memory of the way he had acted.

I’ve noticed that a lot of his adolescent behavior takes place when we are with his family. He treats them horribly and never apologizes. Mitch even saw a counselor who pointed this out to him, so he quit going. A year ago, Mitch tried another counselor, who told him he was perfectly fine and maybe we should try marriage counseling. We did, but it didn’t help.

I feel as if I am married to a preschooler. If Mitch doesn’t get his way, there’s a fight. He resents my family, so I’ve stopped spending time with them in order to avoid conflict. I feel trapped. I would leave, but I cannot support my son on my income alone. I no longer enjoy being with Mitch and am thankful when his job takes him out of town for several days. Any advice? – Frustrated

Dear Frustrated: Some of this is Mitch’s refusal to regulate his blood sugar levels. But that is a conscious choice on his part and gives him an excuse to be rude and inconsiderate. Please try counseling again, and ask Mitch to come with you. If he refuses, go without him.