Arrow-right Camera
Subscribe now

This column reflects the opinion of the writer. Learn about the differences between a news story and an opinion column.

The Slice: Our goal here is to get a kick out of a little name-calling

Who’s in the mood for a little name-calling?

A representative of the Spokane Black Widows women’s soccer team contacted The Slice with a proposal.

Apparently the team wants to change its name. But change it to what?

“I was thinking it’d be a fun question to pose to your readers,” wrote Jason Quintero. “What is a good team name that would represent Spokane?”

OK, let’s do it. Send your ideas to The Slice.

There could be coveted reporter’s notebooks in it for several readers.

But I’ll go first.

How about something that sounds Western? Spokane Saloon Gals.

Or how about naming the team after a smart bird familiar to all of us? Spokane Crow.

Maybe something that speaks to our family-oriented lifestyles? Spokane Minivans.

What about a name that sort of says “Northwest”? Spokane Earth Mothers.

How about taking a stand on a public policy issue? Spokane Vaccinators.

Or what about a name that might attract a built-in fan base among 18-year-olds? Spokane Caitlins.

Perhaps something that implies courage? Spokane Pedestrians.

Or addresses a local animal-control problem? Spokane Unlicensed Bitches.

What about a name that alludes to the winter tire controversy? Spokane Stud Banners.

Or the roads? Spokane Potholes.

Or social reality? Spokane Single Mothers.

Maybe something that suggests the hurly-burly of the Internet? Spokane Pseudonymous Posters.

How about naming the team after the mayor? Spokane Marys.

Or maybe after a plant or landscape formation? Spokane Lilac Bushes. Spokane Basalt Outcroppings.

Could focusing on a local recreation favorite work? Spokane Campers.

Or a leading local occupation? Spokane Nurses.

How about saluting the Air Force? Spokane Tankers.

Or Idaho? Spokane Athols.

Could taking advantage of the fact that there is no longer a Major League baseball team in Montreal be the way to go? Spokane Expos.

What about naming the team after someone famous with local ties? Spokane Bings.

OK, your turn.

Today’s Slice question:

Is there some annual event on the Spokane calendar that always reminds you of something momentous in your personal life that took place at that time?

Write The Slice at P.O. Box 2160, Spokane, WA 99210; call (509) 459-5470; fax (509) 459-5098; e-mail pault@spokesman.com. There are those who know who Steve Prefontaine was and those who don’t.

More from this author