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Front Porch: Trivia scorekeepers dance like no one’s counting

There’s one in every math class. The kid who slowly trudges up to the whiteboard, grips a marker with a shaking hand, stares hopelessly at the problem and prays for divine intervention.

That was me. Divine intervention never arrived, and math and I failed to bond.

Yet last Thursday night at the inaugural Spokane Trivia Championship, I stood onstage at the Bing Crosby Theater, in front of a crowd of hundreds, facing a whiteboard with a marker in hand.

There was math to be done.

When my friend Sarah Bain, director of development for the Spokane Public Library Foundation, asked me to serve as an official scorekeeper for the event, I laughed. I assumed she was joking. She wasn’t. “You only have to add to 10,” she cajoled. “It will be FUN!” she promised.

I’m pretty sure “math” and “fun” are mutually exclusive terms. However, it’s basically impossible to say no to Sarah. In addition, the event was a fundraiser for the library foundation, a nonprofit organization that enhances the programs, services and resources offered by Spokane Public Library.

I love libraries and Sarah, so with some trepidation I agreed. My one condition was that I wouldn’t be the lone scorekeeper.

Enter Linn Parish, deputy editor at the Spokane Journal of Business. I’ve known Linn for many years and felt that he would add an air of respectability to the proceedings – or at least be able to add to 10.

So, Thursday night found us surrounded by teams with names like “Dunk the Mustard,” “Shroovy Goos” and “The Grey Matters.”

Radio and print were well represented with teams from KZZU, ESPN700, the Inlander and, of course, The Spokesman-Review. “The Press Club” team members Carolyn Lamberson, Mike McGarr and Paul Turner beat out a host of contenders in a newsroom trivia contest to earn the honor of representing the newspaper at this historic event.

The fact that no television news stations fielded a team was duly noted and remarked upon. Challenges to Melissa Luck, Randy Shaw and Stephanie Vigil were issued via social media.

Round One began. Under specific instructions from Sarah to “have fun” and make scorekeeping “not boring,” Linn and I did the only logical thing.

We danced.

While waiting for contestants to write their answers, we grooved to the catchy little tune that played during the lull. Or maybe we jived. I’m not a professionally trained dancer, so the technical terms are a bit murky to me.

And that’s when I discovered that Linn, in addition to being a talented writer and skillful editor, has “Moves Like Jagger” or more accurately, “Bops Like Bill.”

Indeed, his patented Bill Cosby shimmies wowed the crowd, though some mistook his dance as a bittersweet tribute to some long-defunct University of Montana fraternity.

During the brief break between Rounds Two and Three, I checked my phone and to my dismay discovered multiple videos of our dancing had been posted on the Internet. A friend asked via Twitter, “So, what happens at The Bing doesn’t stay at The Bing?”

The answer to that question? No. Especially with savvy social media types armed with smartphones in the crowd.

Of course, that wasn’t the only question answered at the trivia challenge. We found out which Baseball Hall of Famers also played for the Harlem Globetrotters and learned Mildred Bailey, aka “Mrs. Swing,” hailed from Tekoa, Washington.

The questions and answers swirled around us as fast as we could put hash marks on the board – a challenge for journalists more used to hashtags.

The heated final round ended in a three-way tie between the SR’s Press Club, Itron’s Smart Grid Smarty Pants and an individual team, Lakeside Trivia Trio.

With the competition in overtime, questions flew, markers scribbled and scorekeepers danced.

And it all came down to camelids. Who knew knowledge of even-toed ungulates could be so significant?

Alas, the Press Club came up one camelid short and team Smart Grid Smarty Pants lived up to their name and took home the coveted first-place trophy.

More importantly, approximately $12,000 was raised for the Spokane Public Library Foundation, with donations still coming in.

However, from the response of the enthusiastic crowd, it appeared the highest score at the Spokane Trivia Championship was absolute fun.

The evening proved educational for me, as well. I learned math isn’t nearly as intimidating if you don’t have to add higher than 10 and can dance while doing it.

Here’s to next year!

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