Dear Annie: I have been married to my husband for six years. A few months after the wedding, I found out he was cheating on me. I saw his cellphone while he was sleeping and noticed the messages and phone calls. He had been meeting girls from dating sites, talking to them and exchanging photographs. He also wouldn’t come home till 3 or 4 a.m.
I called one of the girls and told her I am his wife and she should stop talking to him. That’s when she told me she was pregnant with his child. I confronted my husband, who said the woman was lying. He also apologized and promised to stop cheating.
Several weeks later, he was again out until after midnight. He texted that he was coming home, but I tripped and hurt my ankle. I called several times and left messages, but it took an hour until he texted that he was on his way.
We have tried to work things out, but I feel that he doesn’t want me anymore, or that he only wants me for a place to live and money in the bank. When he touches me, it doesn’t feel genuine.
I recently found out that he has been on dating sites again, possibly meeting up with these women when he claims to be out fishing. When I asked him about it, he said, “I haven’t done anything. I just ask for photographs to see how far they will go.”
Do you think he really wants me? Should I keep trying to work it out with him? I am scared that he is just going to keep hurting me. – Alabama
Dear Alabama: We can guarantee he will keep hurting you, because he doesn’t see that he’s doing anything wrong and has no interest in changing his behavior, no matter how much it upsets you. Please get some counseling on your own to decide what you are willing to tolerate and to determine your next step.
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