Doug Clark: Citizen Hall of Fame nomination is honor, winning is long shot

When you reach a certain point in your career, it’s only natural to start obsessing about legacy.

Well, legacy and that old debate about cremation vs. burial.

But sticking to the former, I have given some thought about how much the mayor would charge to name a street after me.

Or even a cul-de-sac. I’m not that picky.

But my quest for a scrap of everlasting attention took an exciting twist the other day with a phone call from Sarah Bain, director of development for the Spokane Public Library Foundation.

She advised me to check out their website ( www.spokanelibraryfoundation.org), which is how I learned that I have been inducted into the city’s first “Citizen Hall of Fame.”

Wait a second.

Whew. Good thing I didn’t yank out my acceptance speech the way poor Michael Keaton did during the Academy Awards.

Upon closer inspection it appears I have only been “nominated” for the Citizen Hall of Fame, along with …

Good lord, half the town must be on this list.

Look, I don’t want to minimize the great honor of being included in this wonderful yada-yada-yada. I’m just a little depressed at being surrounded by so many hifalutin nominees, such as:

Hotel magnate Walt Worthy. Famed sculptor Harold Balazs. Bloomsday founder Don Kardong. Spokane’s first woman mayor, the late Vicki McNeill. Sports czar Bobby Brett …

I have to handle this next name delicately.

But it appears that even the certain someone who issues my paychecks is up for the Hall of Fame.

This is so potentially awkward.

After all, I sometimes ride the newspaper elevator with this gentleman. How uncomfortable will that be if, say, I’m a Hall of Famer and he’s not?

The way I understand it, six deceased nominees and six living nominees will be selected through a process that involves nine bribe-proof judges.

Three nominees from the dearly departed side have already been named, Bain said.

They are King Cole, the father of Expo ’74; pioneer feminist May Arkwright Hutton; and Native American leader Chief Spokane Garry.

As for us still-breathing nominees, three finalists will soon be named representing six separate categories.

They include:

1. Economic Development and Business; 2. Education; 3. Public Service and Philanthropy; 4. Innovation and Leadership; 5. Science, Health and Medicine; and the category I’m in, 6. Arts and Letters.

My name, unless it’s another Doug Clark, is sandwiched alphabetically on the main list between financial expert David Clack and the Honorable Harold Clarke Sr.

I guess what I’m trying to say is …

What ice cube’s chance in Hades does a BALD COLUMNIST HAVE?

Well, whataya know. I see Scott Morris made the list.

The Avista CEO is, of course, best known for gas and electric rate hikes as well as raking in $5.5 million last year.

God bless America.

According to the website, some 105 nominations were made for “more than 85 people. (Some people were nominated multiple times!)”

Bain, in fact, told me I was nominated by three separate people. That makes me feel a lot better. I was worried that just my editor had gone to bat for me.

Whoever wins the Arts and Letters category must embody the activities that “enhance and support the artistic/cultural and literary life and wellbeing of the community.”

I don’t want to brag, but community well-being is my co-pilot.

I would also make a terrific Hall of Fame member in that there are virtually no duties that come with the post. All a winner must do is have his or her name displayed on a website and some sort of traveling display.

Winners will also get a key to the city, which, it’s rumored, will open Mayor Condon’s private commode.

By now, you’re probably as excited as I am about who will be named to this year’s Citizen Hall of Fame.

That’s why you’ll want to attend the special awards breakfast (7-9 a.m.) at the Davenport Hotel on April 2. Single tickets are $40. Or $400 will get you a group or corporate table for eight.

Tickets can be purchased via the aforementioned website.

I hope it sells out. Despite what so many of you think, this is not only about seeing me get the recognition that is so appallingly overdue.

This is a fundraiser for the library!

Speaking of which, I wonder if it would help my chances any if I went downtown and actually got a library card?