Annie’s Mailbox: Friends not true if they dump you over breakup

Dear Annie: I am 17 years old and still in high school. I recently became “Jake’s” girlfriend. We’ve been dating for about a week.

I’ve known Jake as a friend for a year, and we hang out with the same group. I never had feelings for him until I learned that he liked me, and even then, my friends kind of pushed me into the relationship.

His last relationship didn’t last long, partly because he and the girl had sex right away. I told him I am a religious girl and am not going to do sexual things with him. Well, we went to prom together and back to his house afterward, where we were alone. He started to put his hand up the back of my dress. I didn’t object because he was mostly stroking my back.

The next day, we went to his house to watch a movie, and he started jumping all over me. It made me uncomfortable, but I’m not good at communicating that, so I didn’t say anything.

Today I realized that I have feelings for another guy, and now I don’t know whether I like him more than Jake. But if I break up with Jake, I will be booted out of our group.

I don’t know what to do. I feel that Jake is pressuring me a little about sex, even though he hasn’t actually demanded anything. Should I wait until summer to end it so that the group will have time to adjust without making things super-awkward? Or should I just end things now and face losing my friends? – Confused Girlfriend

Dear Confused: You already know that you need to break up with Jake because you don’t actually like him and you feel pressured. We’d do it now, but if you would feel more comfortable waiting until school is out, that’s OK, too. You and Jake might be able to drift apart more naturally then. You might also confide in one of your friends that you and Jake don’t seem to be hitting it off as well as you thought. If your friends drop you over this, they aren’t truly friends.