Annie’s Mailbox: Live-ins aren’t following rules

Dear Annie: I am 17, married, with a 1-year-old daughter. I am doing amazingly well for a teen mom. My husband and I have a house and car, I’m finishing school, and we are both working.

Before we moved into our house, we lived with my husband’s father and brother. When my brother-in-law expressed interest in getting a dog, I told him that wouldn’t be possible because my daughter is allergic. He became furious and attacked me with a knife. I left the house with my daughter and stayed with my mom until we found our current place.

I decided to be the bigger person and let the situation pass. But recently, my father-in-law’s electricity was shut off and they ended up homeless. So my husband and I let the two of them stay until they can get back on their feet. We asked them to pay $150 toward rent and insisted there be no smoking in the house.

I recently discovered my brother-in-law is smoking pot regularly at school. I told his father if I drug test him and it comes out positive, they are gone. But, Annie, it went in one ear and out the other.

I am so frustrated. I want my brother-in-law out of the house now, and no one is listening to me. I don’t know what to do. – Trying to be the Grown-Up

Dear Trying: If possession of pot is illegal in your state, then your brother-in-law is putting your entire household at risk if he keeps it in your home. Otherwise, if he is smoking pot only at school, he is technically following your rules. Where is your husband in all this? He should be supportive of your position. Both of you should be helping your in-laws move into their own place as soon as possible. Do they need assistance finding jobs? Finding affordable housing? Give them a hand with those issues and you will also be helping yourself.