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The Slice: Sometimes it just turns out that way

I sometimes wonder if home-schooled kids really ever get it about Mondays.

You know, learn the lesson that the weekend doesn’t last long and, when Monday arrives with a thud, it’s time once again to get up, get dressed and get your butt to school.

Now I realize not all home-school settings are identical. I’m not judging that option. I’m sure it’s terrific in some situations, a travesty in others.

But a smart person once said, “Eighty percent of success is showing up.”

And I think there’s something to that. It’s a lesson Mondays can teach like nothing else.

When you don’t care about football and do not want to hear about it: Last week’s question about tactics for stiff-arming Monday morning football conversations prompted responses from readers who almost all wished to remain anonymous.

I hadn’t realized this was such a sensitive topic. Perhaps my shy correspondents work in offices populated by weekend face-painters.

In any case, Vince Roland said you can usually escape such conversations by generically criticizing the referees, waiting for others to join in and then quietly slipping away.

If you have never lived in a city that has hills before moving to Spokane: You might be tempted to drive like Steve McQueen in the 1968 movie “Bullitt.”

Resist the urge. It’s not safe. Plus, you aren’t Steve McQueen. You are not in a movie. And, if you have priced houses lately, you know that Spokane is not San Francisco.

Another thing you’ll discover, if you moved here from California: A lot of people in Spokane will assume you have never lived anywhere but California when, often, that’s not at all the case.

Warm-up questions: Which is a better cache of potential baby names for male newborns, Civil War generals (Jubal, Ambrose, Josiah, et cetera) or baseball players (Old Hoss, Early, Dizzy, et cetera)?

How about for baby girls? Jane Austen characters (Elinor, Fanny, Lady Catherine de Bourgh, et cetera) or Beatrix Potter animals (Jemima, Hunca Munca, Mittens, et cetera)?

How about for pets? Members of the 1970 Spokane Indians (Doyle, Steve, Von, et cetera) or circa 1988 Spokane TV news anchors (Deb, Maureen, Marianne, et cetera)?

Today’s Slice question: How should I feel about having my column mug shot covered up (Friday’s features section) by the placement of a promotional sticker for a marijuana store?

(I’ll send a coveted reporter’s notebook to the reader submitting the best suggestion.)

Write The Slice at P. O. Box 2160, Spokane, WA 99210; call (509) 459-5470; email pault@spokesman.com. You’re not really being civic-minded if you hope we get winds like those we had last November once all the leaves are down in your yard.

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