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Huckleberries: Rural life is fine until Woody Woodpecker comes knocking

Lee Sorenson of Post Falls enjoys reading Ammi Midstokke’s adventures in the S-R Outdoors pages.

It reminds him of “the years of commutes, winters, and Mother Nature’s jokes” in the Spirit Lake and Blanchard Valley areas. Lee emails: “I feel her reality.” Lee is reminded in particular of a woodpecker that loved the corner of his then 15-year-old son’s room.

It was 1998. The family had just moved into a two-story house. Lee and family did everything to discourage Woody Woodpecker from drilling. The son would chase it off in the early mornings. But it would return pecking before the boy drifted back to sleep. Lee dabbed hot sauce in Woody’s favorite spot. No dice. Then, he hung a fake owl from the eaves. Nothing. Finally, he tried hanging shiny CDs nearby and nailing tin over the woodpecker’s fave spot.

But Woody hammered on. The old hands at the hardware store said a box of 22s was the only solution. They were right. The family felt badly afterward.

Now, Lee lives in the “megalopolis” – his word, not Huckleberries’ – of Post Falls. The only annoying bird in his life is a robin that likes his strawberries. Which is OK. As long as it doesn’t knock first.

Bad, bad owner

David Townsend of Coeur d’Alene spotted a dog tied to a tree next to his car when he exited Costco Sunday evening. She had water and was in the shade. But she was distressed. David petted her for 20 minutes until the owner showed up. He had feared that the dog might have been abandoned because she was an older one. Dave had begun a countdown in his mind when the owner arrived as the store shut. He had planned to take the dog home and call animal control. Instead, he told the woman that it was illegal to leave a dog unattended in Coeur d’Alene. The woman was defensive. She said it was better to leave the dog outside with water than in a hot car. Yes, Dave responded, but it would have been better still to leave the dog at home. Dave, who still mourns the loss of his beloved 14-year-old pup last fall, sums up the feeling many would have: “I have little patience with people who don’t appreciate a good dog.”

Huckleberries

Poet’s Corner: Palouse winds blow heavy/and they blow very far;/now somebody’s wheat field/is all over my car – “The Bard of Sherman Avenue: Poems by Tom Wobker” (“Windstorm”) … So a Huckleberry Friend is eating lunch in a family restaurant in Priest Lake when a beautiful young woman enters wearing only a thong bikini. Everyone had a bird’s-eye view of her back side, including children from 3 to 7 years old. Our Huckleberry Friend is no prude. But she said after the fleshy display: “You’re in a family restaurant, put something on.” Bingo … The Uber Phantom gave a ride to a married couple who told him of an interesting way that they keep the lines of communication open. Once a month, the husband asks his wife to tell him something about her that he doesn’t know. It seems to be working for them. Says Uber Phantom: “I love the idea” … Poll: My Huckleberries blog readers are fussy. Fifty-five percent of them won’t eat roadkill. Moi? Only if I don’t know that it is.

Parting Shot

Coeur d’Alene Councilman Dan Gookin was having none of Chairman Brent Regan’s lame explanation why yet another moderate Republican had quit the Kootenai County GOP Central Committee. After tendering her resignation from the Central Committee, main-streamer Christa Hazel blasted Regan’s organization as extreme ideologically and conspiratorial in a Coeur d’Alene Press column Saturday. Regan responded with his own column in the Press Tuesday. And Gookin cut Regan off online: “”How can you say that the committee is diverse when many people – good longstanding Republicans – have left in utter disgust? Ms. Hazel is only the latest refugee in a lengthy queue of respected party members who’ve had enough of this circus.” Kootenai County Republicans folded their big tent years ago.

You can contact D.F. “Dave” Oliveria at 509-319-0354 or daveo@spokesman.com.