Dear Annie: I have a question on how to handle gift giving among extended family.
We are over age 60, and my husband feels very strongly that adults can buy whatever they want, and there is no need to send a gift. This is our second marriage. We both lost our spouses to cancer.
I like to remember family on special occasions. I often send a monetary gift less than $60. My husband points out that they never remember us on special occasions.
My husband is generous with his family, either by offering to fix something mechanical or by sending money. His family does reciprocate.
I use my own money to gift my family, and he does the same. But he gets angry with me.
Just wanting a second opinion. What do you think? – Double Standard?
Dear Double Standard?: Tell your husband to cut it out! If you want to give your family members a gift, then give them a gift. It is not about whether they are adults and can buy themselves things. It’s that you take the time and think about them on special occasions.
In addition, it is not tit for tat. You don’t give gifts so you get gifts. You give gifts because you love your family and want them to know you are thinking about them.
Dear Annie: I am an elderly person, and I purchased an AT&T phone that blocks all calls coming in except for the phone numbers you have listed in your phone. It tells the caller that if they leave their name, it will announce it, and if the person being called wants to answer it, they can.
This has saved me from a great many robocalls or calls from scammers. I chose to get the phone after my “grandson” called to tell me he was in jail. I told him to enjoy every minute there, hung up and got this phone. All elderly should have a phone like this. – This Phone Works
Dear This Phone Works: Thank you for your tip. It is wonderful that a phone itself can protect you from scammers so you don’t have to deal with them.
Send your questions for Annie Lane to firstname.lastname@example.org.
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