Dad Daze Revisited: The Damar Hamlin injury hits home

“You’re only going to get hurt playing football,” I explained to my son Milo prior to his most recent football season.

Many of my friend’s teen sons suffered serious injuries on the gridiron, such as shredded knees, broken collarbones and concussions.

“But I have to play,” Milo said. “My friends are playing and I love it.”

It was like a film remake. I had the same conversation with Milo’s older brother, Eddie, in 2019. Football was their third-best sport behind baseball and hockey.

Each boy played football, suffered the same injury, which required the same surgery. Who would ever guess that the broad Condran shoulders were so susceptible to separation?

It’s easy for parents to wonder why I didn’t force my sons to watch their teammates battle on the field from the stands. Anyone who has played football or had children who were hell-bent on playing probably understands my decision.

My younger son was compelled to play.

“There is no greater rush than carrying a football,” Milo explained. “Adrenaline surges through your body.”

It goes back to middle school when Milo had six rushing touchdowns, four for more than 50 yards.

During those halcyon days, Milo caught an over-the-shoulder pass with one hand , stepped into a divot and fell to the ground.

“My knee,” he screamed.

“That looks bad, real bad,” a parent screamed.

“Thanks for the nonmedical assessment,” I thought.

Milo caught not only the ball but a break.

“If he were 10 pounds heavier, his knee would have caved,” his coach said.

Milo said he couldn’t watch the film of his knee crumpling.

Milo dodged a bullet and continued to play running back and outside linebacker. Milo’s luck ran out in September. After making a tackle, Milo dislocated his shoulder and just popped it back into place in order to stay in the game for more carries. After an offensive series, Milo made a tackle and the shoulder dislocated again and he was off to the hospital.

Milo’s season appeared to be over, but he rehabbed and rejoined the team. Milo played in five more games. I had hoped that Milo wouldn’t reinjure his left shoulder. While witnessing the start of his final game, a playoff against a much bigger team, I sent a text to his brother: “I’m really afraid that Milo is going to get hurt.”

What followed was akin to a bad TV movie. With 30 seconds left in the game, Milo made a tackle and failed to get up. As the clock ran down and kids were shaking hands, Milo was writhing in agony on the ground as his shoulder dangled from his body. It was off to the ER where he tearfully regretted playing football.

The damage was done.

Surgery was a success and we moved on. Milo’s football career was over, but his football mania hasn’t diminished. If Colgate is playing Yale, Milo is down for the entire contest.

Milo and America are addicted to the violent sport of football. Millions of fans tuned in to see whether the Buffalo Bills and Cincinnati Bengals would play after Buffalo defensive back Damar Hamlin collapsed following a tackle Monday night. The league waited longer than an hour to postpone the game after Hamlin suffered a cardiac arrest. Football is an obsession. The sport, which was almost banned over a century ago, is played with athletes who are like runaway trains colliding at full speed.

There were a number of frightening injuries that occurred over the weekend. The Indianapolis Colts’ Nick Foles and the Philadelphia Eagles’ Josh Sweat were each carted off the field after lying motionless.

Football fans recall the Miami Dolphins Tua Tagovailoa’s head being slammed to the turf against the Bengals in September. Tagovailoa raised his hands and his fingers were splayed, a gesture dubbed a fencing response that can be a sign of brain injury.

Three months later, Tagovailoa was concussed during a game on Christmas day.

Injuries to football players are received in a similar manner to soldiers who return from active duty with a Purple Heart. Since the athletes and warriors are alive, society’s view is that they’re OK, but the combatants are often never the same.

There’s a tremendous Sports Illustrated feature on the 1986 Cincinnati Bengals. The focus is on a team filled with former players who were left with severe mental and physical disabilities. There are some outliers, such as quarterback-turned-TV analyst Boomer Esiason, but many former Bengals dealt with debilitating mental issues after using their heads as battering rams.

So many former football players suffer from CTE and battle depression or simply can’t put their pants on.

Some of the most hard-hitting players I experienced while ushering NFL games during my college days at Veterans Stadium while attending Temple University – defensive backs Andre Waters and Wes Hopkins and fullback Kevin Turner – all died before reaching their 60th birthday.

Injuries and even deaths happen in football. Each year, a number of high school football players perishes from broken necks and heat stroke. Families are forever fractured due to football.

When I think about how upset I was over my sons’ shoulder injuries, I got off easy since they avoided head and other body trauma. But what about other young football players, who are at risk?

Will football, which is the most popular sport among boys throughout the country, make changes for safety sake? And then there are those who would like to close the book on football on the grounds of danger.

The odds of the game being banned are about the same as the Second Amendment being abolished. There is so much money in the world of football in which gambling is pervasive.

I’ll be curious to see what happens to reduce the risk of injury in a game that has outlawed helmet-to-helmet contact and horse-collar tackles, and has eliminated the type of contact quarterbacks endured a generation ago.

Football fans can’t get enough. A week after Milo’s surgery, he and I were on a flight to Minneapolis to catch my beloved Minnesota Vikings battle the Indianapolis Colts. Even though Milo was in a sling, he was ecstatic since he experienced the greatest comeback in NFL history. The Vikings somehow overcame a 33-0 deficit to win in overtime and clinch the NFC North.

“I’ll never forget this game,” Milo said . “This is why I love football.”

Football is a great game, but how will the sport reduce risk since coaches on all levels clamor for the biggest, fastest and strongest players? That remains a mystery, but you can count on the NFL, college, high school and club leagues to continue to play on since game day is what matters most.