Dear Annie: Spouse’s social media fame straining our marriage

Dear Annie: My spouse has become a viral social media sensation. They have been quite popular, and I recently learned of many “friendships” that have developed with members of the opposite sex. One in particular has become, and I quote, “the best friend I have ever had.”

The last year has been filled with many struggles on my end, and I fell into a very deep depression. My spouse chose to ignore this and reach out to these “friends.” They claim they are all platonic.

We have been trying to work on our marriage, but I am really hurt by this. I love this person with all of my heart and really want to make our marriage work. We have had some amazing heart-to-heart conversations recently, and I think they are starting to understand how badly I am hurting by the way they have behaved.

I just don’t know if I can trust the words they say. My intuition says yes, but my head makes me cautious.

Social media is not positive for our marriage, but they won’t give it up. Please help. I am already so heartbroken. – Lonely and Sad

Dear Lonely and Sad: Social media, or any online connection, doesn’t hold a candle to the real heart-to-heart conversation you have had with your spouse. Continue to be open with your feelings and listen to your intuition. If the social media is part of your spouse’s job, then asking them to give that up is not the solution either. The solution is to have personal boundaries on what your partner can and cannot allow on social media.

Talk about what you both feel comfortable with. Healthy communication and trust are great muscles to work in a marriage, and your spouse’s newfound social media fame is certainly giving you the opportunity to do just that. Best of luck to you. In addition, I would encourage you to seek the help of a professional therapist if you are suffering from depression. Try to surround yourself with friends and family when you are feeling down.

Send your questions for Annie Lane to dearannie@creators.com.