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The Spokesman-Review Newspaper The Spokesman-Review

Spokane, Washington  Est. May 19, 1883
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Couch Slouch: Who knew NHL would be a hit in the Mojave Desert?

Couch Slouch: The NHL is back this week, baby! To be sure, it is a poorly calculated gamble to begin a column with the words, “The NHL is back this week, baby!” As a rule, if you’re looking to clear a room, you start talking about either the NHL or the law of diminished marginal utility.

Couch Slouch: Will football cease to exist down the road?

Couch Slouch: High school football participation is down 6.6 percent over the last decade. According to the White House, this is due to NFL players kneeling during the national anthem, a shift from coal to solar-power energy and disastrous Obama-era trade deals. Uh, whither high school football?

Couch Slouch: Nepotism alive and well among NFL coaches

Couch Slouch: As the NFL begins another flag-waving, player-kneeling, Nike-infested, anthem-ambivalent, Kaepernick-free season, it is important to remember that – on the sideline – in the immortal words of Sly & the Family Stone, it’s a family affair.

Couch Slouch: K-Zone destroying viewing pleasure of baseball fans one pitch at a time

Couch Slouch: I was checking my Twitter feed while bathing the other afternoon – I installed an umbrella-type device near the showerhead to protect my iPhone from absorbing any errant shower water – when I came across a simple, sublime sentiment via tweet by veteran Northern California journalist Andy Furillo: “Memo to Trump: America can never be made great again as long as TV maintains the chimera of the definitive strike zone. Get rid of the (expletive) box.”

Couch Slouch: More people lining up for Lolita than Marlins in Miami

Couch Slouch: There appears to be a growing crisis in Major League Baseball: Everybody strikes out and nobody goes to games. Of course, I exaggerate. I do this to ensure that casual readers – basically, anyone outside of my immediate family – continue to read on.

Couch Slouch: State of California misses boat on surfing

California – which, for all intents and purposes, is a separate nation-state, like Texas or the NCAA – is in the process of declaring surfing as its official state sport. First the immigration issue, now this.

Couch Slouch: Old QBs never quite fade away

Couch Slouch: Kurt Warner, Ben Roethlisberger and Tom Brady are three of the iconic NFL quarterbacks of the last 20 years: One is retired, one talks about retiring and one will never retire.

Couch Slouch: Influx of MLS franchises nightmare come true

Couch Slouch: When I was growing up in the late 1960s playing kick drums, kickball and kick the can, I had a dream that one day there would be dozens and dozens of professional soccer teams in America. Actually, it might’ve been a nightmare. Either way, it’s come true!

Couch Slouch: Olympics has turned Orwellian

Couch Slouch: Approaching my third week of boycotting the 2018 Winter Olympics, I want to say something that, frankly, nobody really wants to hear; in fact, when I brought this up the other night while eating at my parents’ house, my mother told me that I would have to use the drive-thru window the next time I came over for dinner. So here we go: The Olympics ideal is, well, hooey-and-a-half.