CdA Barbie Comes With Tummy Tuck

At the Moscow-Pullman Daily News, Inkster columnist Vera White received a letter from a friend who, tongue firmly cheeked, provided a list of Barbie dolls for the Idaho market, including:

• “Boise Barbie: This collagen injected, rhino-plastic Barbie wears a leopard print outfit and drinks cosmopolitans while entertaining friends. Percocet prescription available as well as newly built spec house in new sub division.

Coeur d’ Alene Barbie: She comes with an assortment of Kate Spade Handbags, a Lexus SUV (with Idaho or California plates optional), a long-haired foreign dog named Belle and a million dollar waterfront home. Available with or without tummy tuck and face-lift. Workaholic Ken sold only in conjunction with the augmented version.

• Rural Panhandle Barbie: This pale model comes dressed in her own Wrangler jeans, two sizes too small, a NASCAR t-shirt and Tweety Bird tattoo on our shoulder. She has a six-pack of Bud Light and a Hank Williams Jr. CD set. She can spit over five feet and kick mullet-haired Ken’s butt when she is drunk. Purchase her pickup truck separately and get a Confederate flag bumper sticker absolutely free.”
• Complete list here

Question: Can you think of any other Barbies and their assessories that would be fitting for North Idaho?