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Spokane, Washington  Est. May 19, 1883
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Huckleberries Online

When nature calls, terror can follow

Today we explore that old saying we’ve all heard a million times, you know, the one that goes … Look before you leak! You can bet Phyllis Goodwin will never forget this adage after surviving her near-death Attack of the Toilet Squirrel. Granted, “near-death” is a bit of a stretch, but only because Goodwin apparently has the cardiac constitution of a 20-year-old marathoner. If what you’re about to read had happened to me, I would’ve:

  • 1. Shrieked like a little girl.
  • 2. Dropped toes-up onto the bathroom floor, just like poor bloated Elvis.

The bottom line is that Goodwin, 74, experienced the deep-seated horror that every bathroom and outhouse user has contemplated at one time or another. I’m talking about the fear that while sitting in such an exposed and dangling condition, something creepy and crawly – possibly Satan himself or a giant spider – will slither up and BITE YOU!!!  What happened to Goodwin proves that this can happen. “There was something splashing in my toilet that I was sitting on,” said Goodwin. Yikes/Doug Clark, SR. More here.

D.F. Oliveria
D.F. (Dave) Oliveria joined The Spokesman-Review in 1984. He currently is a columnist and compiles the Huckleberries Online blog and writes about North Idaho in his Huckleberries column.

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