The Slice: Lucky it wasn’t the spaghetti

EVERY ONCE IN A WHILE, an e-mail arrives at Slice Headquarters that sums up the reality of parenthood. “We just went out to dinner,” wrote Sandra Bancroft-Billings. “Our 2-year-old put rice in the hair of the woman sitting in the booth behind us. “Boy, she was nice! Very sweet and understanding.” Maybe rice is an excellent conditioner.

“ Cat caption contest: Here’s a fair sampling. Please vote for your favorite. I’ll send the winner a small prize.

“Gotta go, gotta go, gotta go right now.” – Ray Wenning

“Gee, no wonder the rent’s only $14 a month.” – Larry Quine

“Dang it, they said this paper was only fit for wrapping fish. So where’s the salmon?” – Boyd Foster

“Hoping for a cat-a-log.” – Luella Dow

“C’mon out. It’s registered. You have to sign for it.” – Dave Lynch

“They say The Spokesman-Review is going to the dogs, but it won’t happen on my watch.” – John Graham

“So where’s the newspaper? There’s supposed to be an article today on planting catnip.” – Trudy L. Zaborski

“The Spokesman-Review really needs to build a larger parking garage.” – John Krom

“Sly always wants to be the first member of the family to read ‘Mutts’ each morning.” – Kay Krom

“I’m looking for the Monday, Wednesday, and Friday Slice. Maybe it’s still in the box.” – Lan Hellie

“After this they can get their own damn paper.” – Alan Howard

“Reading the latest mews.” – Melinda Jensen

“Come on out of there, Kershner. I know you’re in there.” – Carla Bengtson

“Now there’s an animal who’s been paper trained.” – J.R. Hill

“Hey! Where’s my Spokesman-Review? It must be here somewhere. My carrier is so dependable.” – Arlene Pickering

“Rats! I would have sworn it was a Slice day.” – Robin Jones

“Ah, morning paper, a fat worm and wait for breakfast.” – Tim Groh

“Heads or tails … tails have it.” – Alene Pokstefl

“It’s Wednesday and I heard they were having tuna casserole in the food section.” – Mary Kolar

“I use the newspaper in the house, but this is ridiculous.” – Melanie Sullivan

“I can’t get enough of meow (my) Spokesman-Review.” – Jean Oxrieder

“I really need more light.” – Marje Peterson

“ Slice answers: Fran Brewer reported that her husband, Jack, still has a reel-style lawn mower he purchased in the late ‘40s. He uses it at their lake place.

And Noreen Brown wrote to say her husband, Gary, a retired Spokane firefighter, has 851 baseball caps. “Each one is numbered and on display in our garage,” she said.

“ Today’s Slice question: How has baby-sitting changed?