Best of Huckleberries Online — April 18-22

Clare Bozarth mighta slipped and said she was about to “bake a maybe” but she didn’t name the maybe after Betty Crocker above. See below.

How hot is property in North Idaho? Cis Gors/ From A Simple Mind reports a strange rumor about the Sandpoint area housing market. Seems an owner wanted $150,000 for a house, without a foundation, on five acres in the Samuels area. And was surprised that her sorry property triggered a bidding war among three prospective buyers who jacked up the price to $220,000 – and counting. Inspired, one of the other neighbors is thinking of selling her beautiful place because she’s heard offers that are too good to refuse, sez Cis. Quoth: “Trouble with that idea is – where is there a place to go in this area that isn’t going to cost you, your profits and more?” A voice of reason.

Spoon This
First you should know that a “spoonerism” is a misstatement in which initial sounds are transposed in a pair of words. Then, you might appreciate that Clare Bozarth was excited years ago when she told her sister that she and her hubby were about to “bake a maybe.” Nah, sez Clare, “We did not name our daughter Betty Crocker” … Those keeping tabs on Duane Hagadone’s 17-boat flotilla should check out the latest Vanity Fair , where the Lady Lola and her Shadow are mentioned in a paragraph on Page 254 in an article devoted to the truly Big Dogs, like Paul Allen and his $250 million, 413-foot Octopus … Quotable Quote: “Ever larger boats have replaced palaces, estates, and art as the ultimate symbols of wealth” – Sir J. Paul Getty’s son, Mark, owner of the Talitha G, which charters for $350,000 per week. Does the toy carrier in my bathtub count?

Elephant Droppings
Seems Kootenai County Demos were told what to bring to a Centennial Trail cleanup: “Gloves, water, and some jokes or stories about Republicans to share with the group. The (Carl and Marilyn) Weiks will supply the trash bags, but they will not be big enough to clean up the mess left behind by Republican politicians.” Hey, Huckleberries would hate to pick up after an elephant, too … In the “Grandkids Say the Cutest Things” category, 4-year-old David Lowry thrilled Grandma Jeanne Helstrom Sunday with a quip. Seems Jeanne asked him what kind of stuffed dog he was carrying around in his pocket. Replied David: “It’s a basket hound.” Grandmas are easy to entertain.

Poets Corner
“With winter past and now once more/grass growing green outside his door/the age-old question does appear:/will that darn lawn mower start this year? – The Bard of Sherman Avenue ( “The Mystery of Spring” ) … I ’spose there’s a reason to hope/Now that there’s a new Pope/But don’t look for support/If you want to “abort”’/Cos all he’ll say is “Nope”! – The World According to CDADave ( “Nein” ) … “You’ve got to know when to hold them and know when to fold them especially if you’re doing origami” Bob Salsbury / Shallow Random Thoughts .

Huckleberries
What’s with that photo of a guy in drag grabbing his crotch in the latest NIC Sentinel? Crotch grabbing is so Michael Jackson – and look what happened to him … Ya gotta wonder what a guy’s thinking when he blocks traffic coming and going for 10 minutes by parking his big red rig at the CDA post office entrance, especially when Phil Corless/ The Old Goat Trail is there with his camera to photograph his license plate. (You’ll see it by clicking on Huckleberries Online) … Bumpersnicker (spotted by HBO commenter Brian Keatts) on a car driven by a young femme: “I think! Therefore, I’m single!” … Quoth: “I’m starting to subtract points. You guys are cheating too much!” – instructor Mr. Leary of Post Falls High, in the underground ezine, Post Falls Uncensored .

Parting Shot
Didja hear the one about the guy who thought Cardinal Joseph Ratzinger was John (“Cliff”) Ratzenberger from “Cheers” and wondered how many other former postal workers became pope ?