The Slice: Maybe Janet was hammered

A local woman named Janet called her sister, Barb, and reported that she had a nail stuck in her ear.

Barb was concerned, of course. Her second thought, though, was that this had to be oddest carpentry accident on record.

But it turned out that Janet had been scratching an itch in the middle of the night and a fake fingernail had come off.

“Just for a change: Next time someone notes that the days are getting longer, disagree.

“More nicknames for neighbors: According to the reader who refers to a certain neighbor as “Ms. Thong,” the woman in question likes to wash her car in the skimpiest of swimsuits, performing all sorts of acrobatic moves in the process.

Another reader refers to a couple of neighbors as “Snoops 1” and “Snoops 2.”

And then there’s a guy who has a shower right up against an exterior window. The window isn’t quite as opaque as it should be. So one neighboring family refers to him as “Naked Man.”

“Place the name: A divorce listing caught Rudy Bierig’s eye because a man’s first and last names were both Inland Northwest place names. Bierig wondered how many other such names are out there. “Almira Cheney? Dusty Springdale? Hayden Millwood the 3rd?”

“Northwest accent: Most people don’t seem to think there really is such a thing.

Still, one reader noted that some who grew up here insist on inserting an r-sound in the first syllable of “Washington.”

Another said a few lifetime locals pronounce “Coeur d’Alene” in ways that have more to do with genetics than phonetics.

But Ken Heath, who grew up in Newport and worked at Kaiser-Trentwood for 42 years, was at a restaurant in the Netherlands recently when a stranger approached him and said, “Do I hear a Washington accent?”

The guy asking the question lives in Los Angeles but grew up in Seattle. He said he could tell Heath was from the Evergreen State just from hearing him speak.

“Just wondering: If you were to cast a movie about Spokane event organizers Toby Steward and Barb Beddor, what actors would you choose to play them?

“Locally-flavored: e-mail postscripts: “Yard sale this weekend.” — Rick Soper

“BNSF: Build now, seep forever.” — Larry Blanchard

“Live cheap or die.” — Dianne Cook

“Did you know: Wheatland Bank CEO Susan Pittman Horton routinely shows up on national lists of female stars in the world of banking.

“Today’s Slice question: What’s the tallest tree inside the Spokane city limits?

(Note: The tree that measures the longest from ground to tiptop, not the tree at the highest elevation.)