Headlines @ Closin’ Time — 2/1/06

Supreme Court Justice Samuel Alito places his hand on the Bible as his wife Martha-Ann looks on during his ceremonial swearing-in in the East Room of the White House Wednesday, Feb. 1, 2006, in Washington. (AP Photo/Charles Dharapak)

* Britney, NBC plan to mock crucifixion: In ‘Will & Grace’ role, she plays Christian doing cooking segment called ‘Cruci-fixin’s‘ /WorldNetDaily — Will I get the lynch mob after me again if I admit that I’ve never watched “Will & Grace”?

* Muhammad-cartoon controversy heats up: Newspapers across Europe reprint caricatures in support of Danish publication /BBC News — A dare the, ahem, brain trust at “Will & Grace” to poke fun at Muhammad rather than Christ, and see what happens. Make that double dog dare.

* Women sue Wal-Mart over morning-after pill: Accuse retail giant of violating state regulation by failing to stock contraceptive /Associated Press — Wal*Mart can’t catch a break.

* Porn spammer pleads guilty: Conviction 2nd-ever for transmission of obscene e-mail messages /Computer World — Most excellent.

* BNUDE OK for license plates, but not GOT GUN: ‘The ones that are bad are bad … They try to get away with disguising it’ /South Florida Sun-Sentinel — Gotta give “Got Gun” credit for a message with bite. Most vanity plates are BOORING.