The Slice: Dad sends brotherly deterrence

Spokane’s Mark Bekken believes parents should use their children wisely.

So when his 15-year-old daughter had a boy over and the two of them went downstairs to watch TV, Bekken hired his 13-year-old son to go down and act as a chaperone.

“Slice answers (luggage that flew off the top of the car): “At the end of the spring semester at Washington State College in 1943, four fraternity brothers returned to homes in the Puget Sound area in an ancient sedan,” wrote Dean Ratzman, who retired to Spokane after a law career.

Back in ‘43, he was about to go into the Navy. His possessions were in a trunk tied to the top of the car.

“At a stop in Ellensburg we discovered that the trunk had blown off.”

But Ratzman’s Tacoma address was in the trunk. And whoever found it, sent it to him.

“The shipping tag listed LaCrosse, Wash., as the point of origin. So it must have flown off in the vicinity of Dusty. I wish I had known whom to thank.”

In Ray Blowers’ story, he knew who not to thank.

It was 1987 and he was on his way to Portland. Near Cheney, he heard a thump. “Checking the rear-view mirror, I saw my suitcase tumbling toward the ditch.”

It took him a moment to pull off to the shoulder and stop. “As I was walking back down the freeway to retrieve my property, a young fellow hopped out of a Chevy Blazer, grabbed the case and raced past me as I waved my arms to attract his attention. Needless to say, we didn’t make eye contact.”

Moments later, a Washington State Patrol officer asked Blowers what he was doing out of his car. Their conversation led to the prompt return of the suitcase.

The luggage snatcher’s story? “He said he intended to turn it in at the Moses Lake patrol office,” wrote Blowers. “Right.”

“Jealousy Made Me Do It Department: The Slice asked about ridiculous things done as a result of jealousy.

“It’s more pathetic than ridiculous but I guess it gives me a little pleasure to do it and to write about it,” wrote a reader who shall remain anonymous.

Here’s her story.

“My husband and I just celebrated our 50th anniversary,” she wrote. “All was hugs and kisses and we were fine. Then I came across an old love letter.”

It wasn’t from her.

“It should have been too old to cause jealousy and I should be too old to be jealous. I mentioned it, ranted and raved but nothing could be done about the past.

“So I forgave and forgot. Well, not completely.

“Every morning I make delicious coffee for the two of us complete with half and half and flavorings. Well, he hasn’t noticed, but his is no longer flavored.

“I told you it was pathetic, but it gives me a little bit of pleasure. I love him too much to do anything real.”

“Today’s Slice question: What were the circumstances when you discovered that one of your kids knew some dirty words?