The Slice: Spokane, the birthplace of hip? Maybe it’s a pipe dream

My father grew up in a little town that makes a big claim.

Whitehall, N.Y., is right next to Vermont and tucked down near the end of beautiful Lake Champlain. For as long as I can remember, the town has referred to itself as “The birthplace of the U.S. Navy.”

That goes back to preparations for a battle with the British out on the lake in 1776. Though debatable and depending heavily on your definition of certain terms, the assertion is not altogether ludicrous.

So I think there’s something Spokane could learn from this.

Did you know that band leader Artie Shaw — “Begin the Beguine” — is said to have called Bing Crosby “the first hip white person born in the United States”?

It’s true. So why doesn’t Spokane call itself “The Birthplace of Hip”?

That would be so cool.

OK, that sort of ignores hip persons of color pre-Bing. Also, there might be some confusion because Bing himself wasn’t actually born here. But certainly it could be said that he developed his early style here.

And “Birthplace of Hip” is so audacious, so unlike Spokane’s usual insecurity, that you can almost picture jaws dropping on the West Side.

I can see the signs now … “Welcome to Spokane. Birthplace of Hip. Apple Maggot Quarantine Area.”

Let’s move on.

“Looking back to last weekend: “Hi, Paul,” wrote Tomas Lynch. “Were you caught off guard by it when U.S. Open announcers referred to Argentine golfer Angel (An-hell) Cabrera by name? I kept hearing ‘Ana Cabrera.’ Can she golf? I wondered.”

Maybe. But KHQ seems to keep her fairly busy most weekends.

“Warm-up questions: Do you ever think of Van Gogh’s “Wheatfield with Crows” when driving in the Palouse? How far down the list of words commonly uttered upon seeing a parking ticket on the windshield would you have to go before coming to a printable exclamation? What beloved movie from your childhood would you now freely characterize as a piece of, uh, work? Does it alarm you to learn that there are teens today growing up without ever going on a date (or even the less formal 2007 equivalent) that included miniature golf? Ever heard the expression “furniture surfer” used to describe someone who is wobbly on his/her feet and goes through a room with one steadying hand on this object or that?

“Today’s Slice question: Who in the Inland Northwest is least interested in celebrities?