The Slice: Do-it-yourself health care? Sue me now for malpractice

Here’s what modern life is like.

Last winter, my wife was just a few feet from the entrance to a Spokane business when she slipped on some ice and landed on the back of her head.

She was dazed and bleeding. I suspected she would need stitches, so we drove to her internist’s office. We hoped they could take care of it there.

Her doctor cleaned the wound and expressed appropriate concern. But she said my wife needed to go to an emergency room for sutures and scans. So that’s what we did.

Now the caring folks at our medical insurance company have weighed in.

They want us to contact the business where the accident took place and find out about that store’s insurance. Then they want us to approach that store’s insurance company and see if it will pay for our medical expenses.

Us, mind you. They want us to do this.

So apparently my employer and I have been paying significant premiums all this time so that, when my family actually needs coverage, we would be invited to play the role of junior claims adjusters.

This strikes me as ludicrous for about 16 different reasons. First and foremost, isn’t that something our insurance company should pursue on its own?

Of course, it is.

But maybe a change is coming. Perhaps DIY is the wave of the future.

Maybe, when the national health-care mess finally gets fixed, my insurance company will be hailed as a pioneer in encouraging patients to take responsibility for themselves.

You have to admit there’s some cost-cutting potential here. We could do our own blood tests. We could admonish ourselves for not using generics. And we could send ourselves forms exactly like ones we’ve already turned in.

Today’s Slice question: What did your medical insurance company do that made you mutter unprintable words?