APhoto Of The Day — 1.4.11

After having a shave ice with family and friends President Barack Obama greets people waiting outside Island Snow at Kailua Beach Center while on vacation with the first family in Kailua, Hawaii, Monday. You write the cutline. (AP Photo/Carolyn Kaster)

Top Cutlines:

• 1. Moments after this photo was taken, Secret Service agents wrestled a female tourist to the ground after she attempted to bite the President’s head off. The President was unfazed by the attack, stating “When I turned and saw that big mouth open up, I thought it was Sarah Palin” — Eddie Torreal.
• 2. “I work in the records department, Mr. President and I just saw your birth cerificate. It’s true you were born here, but I’m confused because it shows your middle name as Adolph” — JohnA.
• 3. (tie) After nearly thirty years, Francine is reunited with her ex-fling, President Barack Obama, who had coldly abandoned her in 1982 after a freak accident during a tryst in the ladies room of Honolulu’s “Poi Paradise Discotheque and Tiki Lounge” left her with permanent lockjaw. Needless to say, the reunion was awkward — OrangeTV, and: The woman was overly eager to shake the President’s hand, but the dog was forced to give him paws — Dan Gookin.
• HM: Nic (great job by all today)