The Slice: A different time, to be sure

We all know how the Pacific Time Zone oozes over into the Idaho Panhandle.

Most of the Gem State is, of course, in Mountain Time.

But did you know that Mountain Time sloshes over to claim part of Eastern Oregon? It’s true.

Well, it makes you wonder. What if this situation were reversed?

What if the top of Idaho was in Mountain Time and what if Eastern Washington was, too?

That could change everything.

Just imagine.

If Spokane was in Mountain Time, lots of people here might feel obliged to wear boots and drive pickups.

Oh, wait.

Well, if Spokane were in Mountain Time, the cultural divide between Eastern Washington and the Seattle area would be underscored by how we set our clocks.

We could say, “Yeah, they’re on California time over there.”

And they could fire back, “Eastern Washington is an hour early and about 40 years late.”

Perhaps being in Mountain Time would be good for our self-image, though. Maybe we would take stock of ourselves and decide that we need to be just a bit more hardy.

“Pacific” has lots of attractive, future-oriented connotations. But let’s face it. “Mountain” suggests a certain rugged self-reliance that Spokane could use in larger doses.

Anyway, here are my guesses about how life might be different if we were in the Mountain Time Zone:

1. Calmer TV news reports on winter weather. (Good.)

2. More chewing-tobacco spitting. (Bad.)

3. More strong/silent men. (Good and bad.)

4. More women in snug jeans. (Good and bad.)

5. More people who understand where food comes from. (Good.)

6. More people wearing appropriate footwear in snow. (Good.)

7. Harder to figure out when TV shows are on. (Toss-up.)

8. More accidentally waking up West Side friends/relatives with early calls. (Good and bad.)

9. One time zone away from Minnesota. (Depends.)

10. New set of off-the-mark regional stereotypes. (Good and bad.)

OK, it’s your turn.

Today’s Slice question: Do you lie to your dental hygienist?