The Slice: Are you really ready for that new ’do?

You tell yourself that this time you’re really going to do it.

This time you are not going to be a wimp. You are not going to surrender to inertia. You are going to be bold. This time, you’ll go for the gusto.

Then you ease your backside into a seat at the salon. And your hair stylist smiles.

“Just a little shape-up?”

It’s your moment of truth.

And once again, you punk out.

“Yeah,” you say.

So much for your made-in-the-shower- with-steely-resolve decision to chuck your boring old look. So much for trying something new.

What explains this crisis of confidence? Why are you afraid of change?

The Slice has a few theories.

1. You fear that the new style you have in mind would make you look too much like Salma Hayek or George Clooney.

2. What if changing your hair doesn’t totally fix your life? What then?

3. You are afraid that Spokane just isn’t ready for the look you envision.

4. You always get your hair cut early in the day and tend to be super-cautious in the morning.

5. You want to draw attention to yourself but don’t want anyone to think you are trying to draw attention to yourself.

6. What if all of your ID card photos no longer resemble you?

7. You still remember the last time you made a radical change with your hair and how co-workers made those cruel allusions to Larry of the Three Stooges and said the new cut goes with your mom jeans.

8. You know what you want, but what if the stylist misinterprets your instructions in such a way as to prompt others to make faces and say “Houston, we’ve got a problem,” cry “Oh, the humanity!” or ask “Are you trying to look like one of Custer’s troops?”

9. If no one notices, it might confirm your fear that you have, in fact, become invisible.

10. You live in Idaho and the look you have been contemplating might be illegal.

11. What if your new haircut makes you irresistible? That could lead to some complications that, while entertaining in the moment, might be bad news in the long run.

12. You are a total chicken.

Today’s Slice question: Where do you draw the line on who you want kissing you on the lips?