The Slice: It’s Spokane, and plenty of wannabes

Jennifer Bell-Towne was reading a parenting magazine when she noticed a letter to the editor from someone in Spokane.

Spokane, Missouri.

She hadn’t realized there was more than one.

“It brought to mind the various times you have written about references to Spokane in songs and movies,” she wrote. “I wonder if any of those were actually referring to Spokane, MO?”

Thanks for the note, Jennifer. But you can stop wondering. They weren’t.

And the mention of Spokane in “Coal Miner’s Daughter” or “Network” aren’t references to Spokane, La.

In addition, when actors alluded to Spokane in “How I Met Your Mother,” “The West Wing,” “Taxi,” “The Bob Newhart Show,” “Frasier,” “The Andy Griffith Show,” etc., they weren’t referring to Spokane, Ohio.

I could go on.

The Lilac City is no megalopolis. But we are the Godzilla of Spokanes.

What you visualize when you hear the word “brunch”: “Containers of leftovers neatly stacked in the freezer,” wrote Gary Polser.

“Huge strawberries,” said Jeri Hershberger.

“Cinnamon rolls,” said Carrie Webbenhurst.

“Someone with too much money and a speech impediment,” said Gerald Ray.

“Mimosas,” said several others.

How I spent my spring break: My 9-year-old friend Trevor Donelan (the kid I always bet that he can’t stay up until midnight on New Year’s Eve) shared his report.

He began, “My vacation was great because I went to California. Home to three fun place. Disneyland, California Adventure, and Legoland.”

It’s a good report, a page and a half long. Referring to the rides, he wrote, “One was called California Screamin but my sister dident like it.”

Sisters, what are you gonna do?

And then there was this, “Also I liked Splash Mountain because it had animals and you don’t get that wet…unless your in the front.”

Words to live by.

Warm-up question: What percentage of local men fantasize about shooting a burglar?

Today’s Slice question: What’s the best/worst way to deal with baldness?