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The Slice: Like it or not, but no reason to hate

Today The Slice presents a transcript of an exclusive interview with a Spokesman-Review reader who hates certain features and columns but cannot stop checking them out.

Q: So averting your eyes hasn’t worked?

A: No, I plunge right in and then get mad or bored all over.

Q: Well, do you sort of enjoy getting angry?

A: Honestly, I don’t know. I suppose there is some satisfaction in having my opinion confirmed over and over.

Q: You realize, of course, that a newspaper is a supermarket of offerings and that no editor imagines that absolutely everything will appeal to each and every reader. Right?

A: I have a right to loathe certain content. And by the way, I think if you are going to use that image you should note that it appears to be continually shrinking supermarket.

Q: Fair enough. But have you been able to identify just what it is about the features and columns in question that rubs you the wrong way?

A: I don’t like the writer. Never have. Never will.

Q: Do others in your household feel the same way?

A: We have a rule about discussing this subject.

Q: What’s the rule?

A: We do not discuss this subject.

Q: Have you ever contacted the writer in question?

A: I’ve posted a few nasty pseudonymous comments online.

Q: Did that make you feel better?

A: Not really. The writer either never saw my comments or saw them but still declined my invitation to apologize for living.

Q: So do you admit to others that you actually read the columns and features in question?

A: Oh, no. I just say I hate them.

Q: Do you secretly hold out hope that one day you will read one of these offending pieces and be pleasantly surprised?

A: Nah. I guess I’m OK with hating them.

Q: Have you ever thought that maybe a column or feature written by you might be just what the newspaper needs?

A: Many times.

Q: But what if some subscribers didn’t like you?

A: Tough. Nobody forced ’em to read me.

Today’s Slice question: Have you ever had to take a quick tango step to avoid colliding with someone making a sudden turn in a motorized wheelchair?

Write The Slice at P.O. Box 2160, Spokane, WA 99210; call (509) 459-5470; email pault@spokesman.com. “Home of the senior discount” is not Spokane’s actual slogan.

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