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Opinion >  Column

The Slice: When long-winded answers kick in, the mind sets sail

Happy Monday. Let’s start on a cheery note.

Walt Lindgren answered the question about the No. 1 drawback of a commitment to listen to all points of view.

“You distressingly discover that many people who you thought were simply stupid are actually psychotic.”

Married couples without children, continued: “In all the discussions, articles and shows about childfree couples, virtually no one expresses the possibility that at least one person in the couple felt they wouldn’t make a good parent,” wrote a regular correspondent who asked that I not use her name this time so she won’t have to slug it out at her church. “That person looked at the unconditional love required, the challenge of discipline, the patience of nurturing and decided, for whatever reason, that they couldn’t do a good job of being a mom or dad. If you express that thought in a group, invariably someone will say, ‘Well, if you’ve thought about that ahead of time, you’re better prepared than most folks who have kids.’ ”

Slice reader Mark Cosgrove and May birthdays: May 1, nephew; May 3, mother-in-law; May 4, grandson; May 5, grandson; May 8, wife; May 27, brother; May 28, daughter; May 30, dad; May 31, his.

A plastic couple: A friend in Cheney told a story about when her children were young.

One of her sons, Matty, had an action figure called Big Jim. Big Jim drove a truck.

And yet, young Matty was astute enough to realize Big Jim’s life might not be complete.

“Matty wanted a Barbie doll to be Big Jim’s wife and ride in his truck with him,” said Matty’s mom.

So his parents procured a common law spouse for Big Jim. They made it a birthday present.

At his birthday party, Matty opened a package containing the Barbie. One problem. He was in a room full of little boys. Receiving a doll as a gift presented masculine-image issues.

But Matty was a lad who could think on his feet. So he handed the Barbie to his father, saying “Here Dad, this must be for you.”

Today’s Slice question: What’s the vegetarian equivalent of meatloaf Monday?

Write The Slice at P.O. Box 2160, Spokane, WA 99210; call (509) 459-5470; email pault@spokesman.com. It’s fine to dislike my column, but Slice intolerance is not an actual allergy.

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