‘Star Wars’ spoilers

Saving time by posting my Star Wars spoilers now. Which ones do you think will be real?

• Holy crap! It was Greedo all along!
• Han Solo’s dad turns out to be Captain Kirk, except for that one timeline.
• Luke’s kid opens a shoe store, which creates super spin-off potential.
• Cloud City becomes Clown City, which creates super spin-off potential.
• Chewbacca is actually Scrappy Doo in a robot suit.
• Yoda and Lando are stuck in a First Order POW camp and engage in all sorts of hi-jinks.
• Everyone goes home and decides it was a pretty good adventure. (my favorite generic ending for any story)

DFO: Feel free to add to the list.