Front Porch: Gingerly stepping on the Facebook bandwagon

Facebook is finally in my life.

Yes, I know, I’m very late to the party. I’m not entirely sure why I’ve resisted so long … well, maybe I do. It just hasn’t interested me. I kind of hesitate to say that out loud, or at least in print, lest anyone think I’m throwing a bunch of judgment on those who really embrace it. My youngest son is active on Facebook – and I like him a whole lot.

As a communication tool, email works just fine for me. And hesitant to pull another piece of the cyber world into my life, I’ve resisted the darn Facebook thing. But my son has been telling me for years now that I should at least see for myself, so when Sam was home for Christmas, he held my hand as I climbed aboard.

I even promised to hang on for at least a couple of months to give this a fair shot.

So here I am about a month in, and I’ve learned a few things. First, it’s OK apparently not to friend someone. Sam said it’s OK. I have to take his word for this, as I’m a newbie here, and I have indeed not replied to some requests. I feel bad about this and am hoping I’m not offending by so doing.

The thing is, I knew I wanted only a small circle in this endeavor. Mostly I want better communication with some family and friends back East, perhaps a couple of people in this neck of the woods and, of course, my sons. I can’t see myself friending and being friended all over the place and facing the implied obligation to “like” all kinds of postings.

Second, I have accumulated nine friends at present, and that feels right. Stop laughing, all you folks with dozens or hundreds of Facebook friends. I am about to reach out to that back-East family I mentioned, so I’m slowly accepting the possibility of a slightly bigger cadre of online friends.

Third, that concern I had about a repeat of what happened in the early days of email – receiving all those kitten pictures, political rants, jokes and various forwarded (unwanted) articles – hasn’t been as numerous as I thought. Sam tells me that the more I participate the more Facebook figures out what I want to receive and will react accordingly. And, of course, I don’t have to read everything that is posted or watch every video that is sent – though I do have to fend off my guilty-for-not-responding inclination as I skip merrily by.

I could spend more time working with the various controls and filters available. It’s not rocket science, after all, but I’m kind of letting it flow organically at the moment.

Sam did caution me about the Facebook vortex, a cavernous deep hole one can fall into, only to emerge once the entire day has been sucked away. I gather this is a real thing. This is not going to be an issue.

And I’m finding that I’m enjoying a few things more than I thought I would. I have received a number of unexpected posts I enjoyed and found one friend from long ago who I thought was lost to time. That’s been nice. My friend Becky has sent photos of the quilts and Halloween costumes she’s made, and I’ve liked seeing those. Sam’s comments are always good to receive.

And I’ve found, too, that people I do hear from via email and phone are much more prolific in their communication on Facebook, so I am actually in better contact. I both love and hate that. The contact is great, but I was really hoping I’d find Facebook to be a big fat dud.

It’s not that I’m a technophobe. I use technology all the time – mostly my computer for work and for emailing and, certainly, my cellphone. However, all I have is a desktop computer and an old-fashioned flip phone (my friends are a bit incredulous that I don’t text), as they fill my needs. I’m just not in love with every cyber thing.

I really wanted to not love Facebook. And I don’t love it exactly, but darn it, I am kind of liking it a little. My beta test continues.

Voices correspondent Stefanie Pettit can be reached by email at upwindsailor@ comcast.net. Previous columns are available at spokesman.com/ columnists.