The Slice: It’s all up in the air

You can’t blame children for growing weary of hearing about how things were different back in the old days.

But they were. I’ll give you an example – treehouses.

Virtually nothing about these arboreal play rooms has stayed the same. Just consider.

Then: Haphazard construction. Little attention to building code. Kids learned by trial and error.

Now: Adult supervision. HGTV influence.

Then: Kids in tree forts talked like pirates before that was a thing.

Now: Kids ask if the treehouse will have WiFi access.

Then: Comic books.

Now: Social media.

Then: Gender divide.

Now: Inclusiveness.

Then: Creative strategies for dealing with “I have to go to the bathroom.”

Now: Lots of trips to the house.

Then: Declarations of intent to stay up there all summer.

Now: “Remind me when it gets near 10:30 because I have to go to soccer day camp.”

Then: Ominous creaking sounds and nails working themselves loose.

Now: Discussions about load-bearing beams.

Then: Splinters.

Now: Carpeting.

Then: Treehouse as a military outpost.

Now: Civilian, peacetime installation.

Then: Cache of junk food.

Now: Nutritious snacks

Then: Strict hierarchy of ranks.

Now: Discussion groups, sharing.

Then: Dirt clods and unripe fruit brought up to the treehouse for ammunition.

Now: Feng shui.

Then: Binoculars.

Now: Neighbors calling Crime Check.

Then: Dog barking down below.

Now: Dog barking down below.

Then: Studying an old copy of Playboy.

Now: There’s this thing called the internet.

Then: Someone down below yelling “What’re you doing up there?”

Now: Someone in the treehouse getting a text reminding him it’s time to take his pills.

Then: Fantasy play inspired by “Swiss Family Robinson.”

Now: A follow-up text: “Did you take your pills?”

Then: An unquestioning belief that summer will last forever.

Now: Same.

Warm-up question: Who was the youngest little boy around here to look at his dad’s hairline and then ask if male pattern baldness is in his future?

Today’s Slice question: What’s the best job for someone who wants to bring his or her dog to work?

Write The Slice at P. O. Box 2160, Spokane, WA 99210; call (509) 459-5470; email pault@spokesman.com. Mike Dodson learned about proper positioning of the handle of a cooking pan by accidentally knocking one over and ruining dinner.