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Opinion >  Column

The Slice: Here’s your Spokane FAQ

In consideration of the visiting college basketball fans in our midst, this might be a good time to review a few frequently asked questions about Spokane.

Sure, you already know this stuff. But it never hurts to go over it one more time, in case you do get asked.

What does “Spokane” mean?

It means “That which is often pronounced incorrectly.”

I see that the University of Idaho is the official NCAA host for the games at the Arena. Is the University of Idaho in Spokane?

No, but we have vandals.

Is it safe to be out and about in Spokane after dark?

Safe enough. But this isn’t Hooterville, if that’s what you are asking.

How far is it to Seattle?

Depends on where you start.

What are Spokane’s leading industries?

Hospitality and remembering Expo ’74.

Where does the Spokane River go?

Yonder.

What is there to do here?

Eat, drink and be merry.

Are there eagles and bears in Spokane?

You mean EWU and University of Montana grads? Plenty.

Anyone ever try to go over the falls in a barrel?

I think that’s how Bing Crosby became famous.

Is Spokane a walkable city?

Yes, if you get out of your chair and don’t get run over.

Are people in Spokane friendly?

Yes, everyone – 100 percent of the time.

What’s the weather like in Spokane?

It’s OK if you dress appropriately.

How big is the Spokane area?

Just right.

Are there celebrities here?

They are one of our top exports.

What about the Riverfront Park garbage-eating goat?

The goat loves kids.

Are people in Spokane big basketball fans?

Some are, but it’s not yet a residency requirement.

How come Spokane keeps getting to host early round games?

Because apparently people here know what they’re doing.

What teams playing here will Spokane fans be rooting for?

Underdogs. And the others.

Today’s Slice questions: Could you make a free-throw? A three-point shot?

Write The Slice at P.O. Box 2160, Spokane, WA 99210; call (509) 459-5470; email pault@spokesman.com. What language did your grandparents speak at home?

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